


Happiness ☺

by KingCheol



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Falling In Love, Fluff, Hiking, Jeonghan, M/M, Slice of Life, coupshan, jeongcheol - Freeform, little drama, scoups, seungcheol - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2019-07-10 02:07:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 32,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15939569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KingCheol/pseuds/KingCheol
Summary: Jeonghan, a successful businessman in his company, goes to Beatitudine to escape his stressful everyday life. On his hiking camping trip he meets the landscape photographer and journalist Seungcheol. And since the encounter their paths cross again and again and who knows where they may lead.





	1. Prologue

The way to happiness isn‘t always an easy one. Tied to obligations, we drown in the sea of negatives around us, making it difficult for us to see the land of joy.

All these expectations we and other have on ourselves, pull us lower and lower until we suffocate, unable to breathe.

It is sometimes easier to close your eyes and escape from it all.

But you should not close your eyes for too long, how else should you find what you are searching for?

What are you looking for?

Finally finding something that will make you smile from both ears, filling your body with warmth, just make you happy…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry this is my first story and my english isn’t that well.  
> I hope you can endure a few grammatical mistakes, because English is not my mother tongue.   
> In case you are wondering, the story takes places in fictional places. Please, have fun reading it. ≧◡≦


	2. The beginning of Seungcheols Journey (Seungcheols POV)

„Ring ring "

  
The loud ringing of the alarm raises Seungcheol out of his sleep. He tries hard to open his eyes, but the morning sun only made it harder for him. Slowly he perceives the outlines of his alarm clock, which indicate 5:30 clock. After 5 minutes of unbearable ringing, he turns of the alarm clock and gets up. Today begins his camping hike trip into the woods of Beatitudine. He loves to discover the almost untouched spots of nature, to capture these wonders in pictures, to introduce people to this beauty with his travelogues. Of course, as a renowned landscape photographer and journalist, he has the best opportunities to make his hobby his job.

 

The man yawns and makes his way to his bathroom.

 

Seungcheol stands in front of the bathroom mirror and brushes his teeth, with his black bedroom hair, which he styled afterwards listless to something to show in public. After 20 minutes he is dressed and ready to leave his apartment. The photographer is wearing a red plaid short-sleeved shirt, a pair of black three-quarter trousers and a green gilet, walking shoes and a red snapback cap. For someone who goes hiking he looks stylish, well, at least he believes it. In the end he throws his heavy black backpack on his shoulders and put on his photo bag.

 

Before he leaves he takes one last look at his apartment, everything seems to be in order. All his plants seem to be fine; he just hopes his new housekeeper will follow his concrete instructions on how to deal with his babies, not like his previous housekeeper. Hopefully he will not see a disaster like last time, it still hurts so much. With this final check he opens his door and locks his apartment.

  
"Hey, are you going on a discovery tour again?" Seungcheol turns to the direction of the voice and sees his neighbour, a tall, tanned man with brown curly hair dressed in a star patterned pyjama. "Yes nature is calling for me. Why are you awake so early on a Sunday, Mingyu?" he asks.

 

"To get the newspaper, unlike you I'm interested in what is happening in our world," Mingyu replies, waving the newspaper in front of his face. "You know I don‘t read the newspaper.  Who understands this crazy world anyway? I prefer to enjoy the untouched nature away from all this madness. But I don‘t think getting the newspaper is the reason for you to get up so early" Seungcheol speaks and pushes the newspaper off his face.

"You know you are a part of this world society? But back to your question; you are right, I have a date today and I have to look good. Not that I do not always look good, but well better than usual... " Mingyu grins and Seungcheol just rolls his eyes.

"What was the name again…. Minghao, no wait Wonwoo?"

 

“Oh my, you are not at all informed about my love life, even if I have told you a thousand times. Listen, I was dating  Minghao for a few weeks two years ago, we had more like an on-off relationship and that with Wonwoo only lasted for four months, in between were a few other guys and one-night-stands, but now I have met someone new. I totally think he is my soulmate. He came to the coffee shop where I work part-time. When he entered the coffee shop, it was as if a huge spotlight was on him, the wind blew through his hair and I was like Wow. I mean hardly any people come here in our dump and when they almost always old people ... Anyway we started talking, his name is Jisoo, he's from Solem and he's here because it seems to be the birthplace of some anime hero. The boy is so cute ... Even though he's a little bit strange ... so my type and- "

 

"Mingyu every time some good-looking guy comes here, you start something with him. But after a few weeks they leave you because you get too attached to them." "I do not need any relationship advices from someone who's been single for 3 years" Mingyu interrupts him. "This with Jisoo is something different. We may not be together yet, but Seungkwan has read my tea leaves and he said -"

 

"Last time Seungkwan read in your tea leaves, he said that you and your boyfriend are soulmates and after three days it was over. However, I don’t have time to listen to your love life; otherwise I will miss my bus. Oh before I forget it, please water my plants. I do not want to come back and see them all dead like last time. You know I'm still traumatized seeing Sally, Tobi, Galahad and all my other babies’ dead. That's why I cannot trust a housekeeper. You have my spare key, right?"

"How mean you should really be more interested in me. Yeah Sure, no problem I'm not a plant killer. But really you should go and see a doctor to check your head. No one gives their plants names."

"I hope for your sake. Shame on you to inhale the oxygen they purify. You're lucky I have to go. See you Bro." Seungcheol chuckles and raises his hand in farewell.

"See you and don’t get lost I won’t search for you, because Jisoo and I will be busy being happy."

"Yeah, sure. But don’t come to me crying your heart out." Seungcheol laughs and goes down the stairs from the third floor into the open air.

 

As soon as he enters the outside, the morning chill hits him in the face. The coolness isn’t a bother more like a little gift before the summer heat crushes one. He smiled as he slowly made his way to the bus stop. The streets are empty, but in this little village it's nothing out of the ordinary on a Sunday morning. From the distance he could already see the bus stop, as he reaches it the stop is empty as expected. After less than 5 minutes he gets on the bus to the train station.

Fortunately he has an annual ticket and spares himself the annoying purchase of a ticket.

 

Seungcheol takes a place in the back row of the bus, where he has a good view of the other passengers. Well, the only passengers were two elderly women, who exchanged their rumours about the village people.

The older woman with the glasses, which in his opinion speaks too fast and loud says, "Did you know that this good-looking guy has someone new again?" "Oh the big tanned man, who could easily pass as an actor?" the other woman replies, while holding a walking stick in her right hand. "Exactly and this time again some young thing from the city."

 

"Ohoho well my niece said that is normal if you look so good. She also said the two would look like the otp from the new manga she bought. She ships them so hard. No idea what the youth nowadays means with ships, otp...or fanfictions or so" The old woman with the glasses replies.

"I see maybe she bought the ma-mango whatever online. You know online shipping. They could be slang words like yolo, rofl or so..."

"Gosh no one says rofl or yolo that’s so out now. My niece also made me a twitter and Instagram account, since she said no one uses Facebook anymore, only people who check those weird fan pages. The hot dude from bingo also has an Instagram account, he even followed me back.”

“Oh my, does your Stephan know that?”

“Stephan doesn’t even know how to turn on the mobile phone by himself.”

 

"Oh Mingyu, if only you knew what they are talking about you ...", Seungcheol laughs softly, inaudible to the two old ladies.

 

„Next stop the central train station.“

 

Well, central station with just two tracks. Seungcheol gets off the bus at this station. The smell of fresh donuts rises in his nose. He glanced at his watch, which reads 7:15. Only 15 minutes before his train leaves, he decides to equip himself with a few snacks for the ride and treat himself one of these donuts or maybe two.

 

Although the little shop at the station looks a bit rustic, but you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. This shop has the world's best donuts. Only the thought of these donuts make his stomach growl and he isn‘t even a sweet tooth. He pushes the shop door open and is greeted by crowded shelves and a sleepy old man. After 10 minutes, he leaves the store packed with snacks and drinks. Slowly he strolls to track 2; it will not be long before the train arrives. Then he takes in an empty compartment and the train slowly leaves the station and leaves Poisson behind.

 

Seungcheol leans his head against the train window and stares at the rapidly passing landscape as he loses himself more and more in his thoughts.

  
Many people forget to appreciate the beauty that surrounds them. They do not see what lies ahead. The blade of grass which is sown with dew drops, the first buds of the purple leaf plum, the morning dew which glistens in the sun. They simply cannot find the time to admire this beauty…

 

Well…

Nevertheless, he can’t escape the feeling tha[t](https://www.dict.cc/englisch-deutsch/that.html)  that he is missing something that makes him really happy...

 

Of course, it brings him joy when he wanders through nature and capturing all those little natural wonders with his camera. However, it would be nice if there was something, the missing piece he could look at and all his worries are forgotten, his face would start to radiate like a thousand suns and a warmth feeling that fulfil his body. The thing that is able to capture his heart completely.

 

"An endless search for something that makes me happy...Something that makes me complete…" Seungcheol whispers softly to himself. "Does something like this even exist?" Trapped in his questioning thoughts, he drifts of in a light slumber.

 

"We will reach Beatitudine shortly, please note to leave your seat clean and don't forget your luggage. We wish you a safe journey. "

 

The loudspeaker announcement tears Seungcheol out of his dozing. He packs his stuff as the train is slowly entering the platform and stops. He is the only person who gets off at this station. No wonder this place is in the middle of nowhere. Not even 25 people live in this village.

 

As soon as he leaves the train, he is already half killed by the midday sun. "Let's start our adventure. This time the destination is the Devils Rock."

With the first step, he embarks on an unexpected adventure.

Maybe he will find what he is looking for.

 


	3. The beginning of Jeonghans journey (Jeonghans POV)

"No listen, if you don’t submit the necessary documents until tomorrow our business deal is over," Jeonghan says with an angry undertone, grinding his teeth as he hangs up the phone. Running the marketing and sales department is not easy...

He has enough of his boring life every day the same monotonous daily routine as the other. To get up every day, drive to work, quarrel with clients and incompetent interns and then arrive home completely exhausted. When he arrives at his home there is no one there except his cat waiting for him. The next morning is the same procedure. It just feels like time is running away from him like he's chasing after nothing. As soon as Monday has started, after three coffees later it's already Friday. So he just does not find the time for himself...

Not that he does not enjoy his work, but he would like a little change... or someone...in his life.

Not that he has trouble finding a lover. He looks damn good and is an overwhelming personality. But most people only see the shell instead of the core. Besides, has no time, his work is the purest slave driver.

"Ah, so frustrating," he mumbles and bangs his head lightly on the office table.

"Bad mood, mmh?" Jeonghan looks up from his desk.  
"Ah Jun..." Before him stands a tall, slender man.  
"Are you in such a bad mood because Jisoo left all the work to you?"  
"Did anyone ever tell you that you do not talk to superiors like that and what comes to your mind coming here with a coffee in hand and not bringing me one too?" Jeonghan says, pointing to the cat-patterned coffee cup in Jun's hand.

Jun just laughs and takes a satisfying sip of coffee before answering, "Well you should not vent your spleen on me. Blame Wonwoo, he told him that shit with the anime hero birthplace not me. You could take a vacation too. I bet it would work wonders on your eye bags."

"First I'm not angry, secondly I do not have dark circles under my eyes, and thirdly I'm definitely not going on a holiday like Jisoo to visit a birth place of some stupid anime character in some faraway never heard dump hole."

  
"I never said you should visit a place like this. Maybe you could go on a camping hiking trip. Forget it; you would not even survive one day in the outdoors." Jun teases.

  
"You know what? You're right. I'll be taking a few days off starting at Monday to discover the untouched nature. Backpack trip I am coming~. “ Jeonghan said, rising from his office chair and slowly approaching Jun.

He puts his hand on Jun's shoulder and whispers with a mischievous grin, "And I would like to thank you in advance that you will take over my work ... ah and Jisoos while I am gone". Then he slowly walks past Jun.

When Jun notices that he just dug his own grave he speaks hastily "Hey wait a second, I'm surrounded by idiots here ... How am I supposed to do that? Wonwoo is kind of slow, it almost seems like he's working in slow motion, Jisoo is not here, Seokmin and Soonyoung are constantly playing pranks on each other, just this morning Soonyoung staples Seokmins tie to a folder and Chan is the new one who has no plan what he is doing here at all for four months. And not to mention the projects and papers you haven’t finished. You are right going on a holiday was a stupid idea ..."

  
„Don’t worry, everything is going to be fine Junie.“ Jeonghan giggles, leaving a dumbfounded Jun behind him.

No one hurt his pride. As if he is not able to go on camping trip for a few days.

A few days later, Sunday evening in Jeonghan's apartment. "Damn, why won’t you close?" Jeonghan yells at his dark blue backpack. In vain he tries to close the away too stuffed backpack.

"Well, then let's just leave my hand lotion behind ... BUT what if I get dry hands? Wait, I'll just leave the first aid box here, someone skilled like me will probably not get hurt. Well, that thing consumes only space and smooth hands are much more important anyway. I'm such a genius, right Serengeti."

Serengeti, his chubby white-haired half-angora cat, claiming the bed like the king he is. The cat only slightly lifts his head and continues to doze.

"You could show more interested in my problems whopper. Damn it still doesn’t want to close.

  
Certainly it is the fault of the guy from the outdoor store.

"No, it's not just an outdoor shop, it's also a studio where my paintings and photographs are exhibited. “ Jeonghan imitates the shop and studio owner’s voice, which he believes the name is Minghao. That guy foist all these annoying camping stuff on him ... compact he says ... Nothing is compact ... I need my hand lotion and my moisturizer, I have such sensitive skin… and my hair care products.... Ah, I'm already getting a crisis. Okay Jeonghan calm down, you'll have a lot of fun in the nature, annoying mosquitoes, disgusting food, hard soil to sleep on, crawling animals…. instead of lying at the beach and sleeping in a cuddly bed. Gosh, why am I so proud?" Jeonghan yells through the room in his monologue.

  
"Oh shit, the neighbours must think I'm completely gone crazy ..."

After a lot of swearing, Jeonghan finally gets to close his backpack. But the joy of his victory over the successful closing of his backpack quickly fades as he remembers that he must carry the backpack on his hike-camping trip through the landscape of Beatitudine.

He has never been in the area of Beatitudine, let alone anywhere near this area. Jeonghan found it by chance when he took a look at a few pictures in Minghaos shop. There is also a huge black rock, which bears the name Devils Rock. The pictures looked really interesting and fascinating, so it was pretty easy for him to choose a destination.

After preparing everything for tomorrow's departure, he goes to sleep.

Much to his dismay, the night flew by fast and the morning dawned. With a lot of struggle, Jeonghan slowly gets up from bed. After an hour he stands dressed and ready to leave in front of his mirror admiring his appearance. He is dressed in a purple-coloured short-sleeved shirt with floral pattern, which he has put into his jeans shorts, a new brown jacket, dark brown hiking boots and a white camping hat and round-eyed glasses adorns his face.

Nobody can deny it; he looks damn hot, although he wears camping clothes.

At the end he stuffs his mobile phone, which he has switched off, in one of the side pockets of the backpack."I will miss you. Then let's go." The newly camper picks up his cat and strokes it. "See you soon Serengeti and-"

His sentence is interrupted by a stormy ringing of his doorbell and a way to loud voice. "OPEN THE DOOR SOONYOUNG IS HERE, YOUR FAVOURITE PERSON IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD. I'M HERE TO PICK YOU UP."

  
Jeonghan opens the door and hisses, "Do you know what time it is? Do you want the whole neighbourhood to wake up? My neighbours already think that I have a screw loose, because they think I keep talking to myself, while I am only talking with my cat.”

„I do not think that's less crazy. Anyway, are you ready to enter the wilderness? GOD I AM STARTING TO TEAR UP" Soonyoung shouts dramatic.

  
Jeonghan rolls his eyes and growls, "Shut up. I only asked you to take me to the train station because I dislike taxis and no one else has time, so please talk quietly. It's away too early in the morning to handle your hyperactive ass."  
"Yeah, yeah. Everything our prince desires," Soonyoung whispers and giggles like a schoolgirl.

"... Ok, I'm not getting angry now… Please, do not forget to feed my little chubby Baby."  
"No problem, but if I forget it is not so tragic, because the fat cat has fat reserves for a full year. "

  
"I'm the only one who is allowed to call my cat fat. And second, we should get on the way my train departs in half an hour. And you know how bad the morning traffic in Solem is. So be kind and carry my backpack down while I lock up my door." As soon as these words have fallen, Jeonghan pushes his backpack into the younger ones hands.

"Oh my gosh, are you hiding a body in here or why is it so heavy?" Soonyoung blurts out, while Jeonghan gives him a dirty look.

"Another matter. Why do you look like a camper from the cover of an outdoor lifestyle magazine?" "Do you want me to hit you?" Soonyoung just laughs and carries the backpack to the car. After a deep breath, the businessman put his cat on the chair and strokes it, bevor saying goodbye. "See you soon Serengeti. Take care…"

With these words, he locks his apartment door and then goes down to Soonyoungs car, an old sky-blue Volvo. After 20 minutes they reach the main train station of Solem.

  
"See you soon, just call me and I'll pick you up from the train station, when you are back."

  
"Thank you, I'll contact you and don’t forget to feed my cat," speaks the brown haired. The other only grinned. "Yeah, we'll see each other." "Bye, see you soon."

Jeonghan waits for Soonyoung to leave the station parking lot before making his way through the crowd. A hectic crowd trying to catch their train so they won‘t be late for school, work or other appointments.

Among them are many people in their chic suits, uniforms, who are not afraid to ram an elbow in someone else or bump into others. Of course, Jeonghan stands out in his camping clothing, earning him a few strange looks. Well they get his backpack in their face. After a fierce fight through the crowd and over a seat, he finally can rest. Shortly after, the train leaves at 06:30am clock.

The train is packed with passengers; the air is stiflingly hot and smell of sweat fills the compartment.

A great start. Jeonghan tries to shut everything down around him. As he is about to drift off to sleep a bit, an old couple starts to bicker causing a baby in his compartment to scream. A sigh escapes his lips.

After two hours of these tortures, he finally reaches his destination. He has never gotten off a train so quickly. Jeonghan stands on the platform of Beatitudine and far and wide no human soul to be seen, only himself and a pleasant silence.

He lets his gaze wander through the unfamiliar landscape. Well his eye catches many impressions many trees and a really tiny village, the burning sun and as far as the eye can see mountains and did he already mention trees. Jeonghan is not quite sure, if he likes what he sees, but expect his lack of sleep and the heat otherwise everything is fine for the moment.

The sun is getting unbearable the longer he stays here at the same spot. Jeonghan decides to take off his jacket and ties it around his waist, and then he opens up the map where the route is marked. "So, let's see ... In which way around do you hold the map? ... oh well.. There's the train station. Then I have left... I think ...“

Jeonghan's journey begins in a world full of new impressions and surprises. Will he survive it without any difficulty?


	4. The meeting (Seungcheols POV)

###  **Day 1 Monday**

_Sometimes the first steps are the hardest._

 

With determination, Seungcheol pushes through the almost untouched forest path. Huge trees tower around him, obscuring the afternoon sun. Almost like an umbrella protecting him from the rain of the sun's rays, making his walk a little more pleasant. It seems nobody has walked this way for a long time. The path is almost unrecognizable. The plants and grasses conquer back what belongs to them.

This has the advantage that the flowers and other precious treasures of nature are well preserved. The air smells wonderfully of forest soil and pine needles. Oh how he missed this fragrance, it's been a month since he was on a discovery tour.

After a while Seungcheol stops and pulls his rabbit patterned handkerchief out of his trouser pockets.

"It's really hot ..." the photographer mumbles and wipes the sweat from his forehead with his handkerchief.

Wild toadstools catch Seungcheols eyes. The mushrooms are settled like a small village around a giant root; a magical eye-catcher. The sun fights its way through the forest canopy, leaving bright spots of light on the magical scene. It looks like a dwelling for little elves, which you see in photo books. He doesn‘t want to miss out on this opportunity, stuffs the handkerchief in his trouser pocket and pulls out his camera.

Slowly he focuses with his camera on the beautiful scenery and takes some pictures.

Still looking through his camera, his gaze wanders upwards. At first everything is out of focus, but as his camera slowly focuses, he sees a tall figure. However, he cannot assign the figure to anyone, as his view is blocked by branches. An animal? No way too big ... He approaches the figure slowly.

"Why do not you let go ... Ouch ... Fuck thorns," growls the figure struggling with the thorny bushes, while insulting it. Definitely a human, who takes a backpack trip for the first time of his life, he assumes. An amusing sight, this person is totally caught in the thorny bushes with his hair and clothes. This sight let Seungcheol escape a little laugh and he cannot resist capturing this scene with his camera.

This causes the other person to look up. How beautiful; the face once hidden by hair shows itself to him. A young, handsome, brown-haired man, whose hair reaches almost to his chin, wears outdoor clothing from every standard outdoor magazine and a pair of glasses adorns his nose. The handsome man glared at him with his fawn eyes and a small frown line forms on his forehead.

How cute. "OMG Seungcheol keep calm. You're not that lonely and desperate...," Seungcheol says to himself. "But he has really smooth skin ... and so voluminous hair ..."

"Hey idiot, what are you doing?" The beautiful angry man snarls, tearing him out of his thoughts. Seungcheol laughs sheepishly and tries not to sound like a complete idiot.

"Um. The story may sound a little bit odd. So I saw a strange figure, which I could not identify as anyone. That's the reason why I came closer. Well, the weird figure who insulted thorn bushes is of course you. Not that you look weird. You look really good and you really have smooth skin. However, your position looked funny when you wanted to free yourself from the thorn bushes. Somehow helpless and without a plan, I could not resist taking a picture. Besides, it seems like you need help?"

The stranger stares at him dumbfounded.

Seungcheol could swear to see a slight blush on the cheeks of the other man, who finally answers with an annoyed and angry undertone in his voice, "Thanks, I don’t need help from a pervert walking around in the woods and taking pictures of other people. And if you take a picture of me again without asking me I will shove your camera down your throat. Idiot."

"Wow so lovely. Oh yes, I just wanted to be nice. Don't label me as pervert. I'm a landscape photographer and a journalist. I am not here to take pictures of people. On the other hand I will promise you not to take a picture of you anymore, because I do not know what else would be interesting about you," Seungcheol says a bit irritable.

Nobody calls him a pervert, even someone who looks so good. Maybe it was wrong to take a photo of him without permission, but he could have expressed it in a nicer way. Like people say it’s not all gold that glitters.

"I never asked for your kindness. Mr.Whatever your Job is." The brown-haired mutters and clumsily tries to free his clothes and hair from the thorn bushes.

The scene is just embarrassing to watch.

  
"Well then I'll just continue my way and abandon you to your fate" Seungcheol teases as he slowly turns around to leave. Soon as the photographer takes a few steps, the other man mumbles.

"Wait, maybe you can help me. But only because-because-it seems complicated.... "

He is petty as no one else so he may tease the other a little bit.

"Where is the magic word "please"?" he provokes. "Assh-" The stranger stops in the middle of the word and thinks for a moment. "Please."

The other grinds his teeth, giving him such a fake smile that someone could feel the hatred behind it from far away.

"I beg your pardon? I didn’t catch that. Could you repeat that? "Seungcheol earns a glare that could kill and the fake smile disappears immediately.

Seungcheol just laughs and helps the stranger out of his awkward situation. "Thank you" The pretty man says curtly, without expecting anyone to believe his words in the slightest way.

"No Problem, by the way, I'm Choi Seungcheol"

"Yoon Jeonghan, it was no pleasure. See you hopefully not again." With these words, Yoon Jeonghan stamped away.

"Still cute..." Seungcheol thinks with a grin on his face as he watches Jeonghan slowly disappear from his sight.

What takes a city men like him to the wild nature? Well I assume he is a city man. Going hiking in the nature doesn’t look like it is his hobby. Jeonghan seems more like a person who dozes off in his bed, watching old movies, sunbathe on the beach or enjoy hot springs on his days off. Maybe that guy is just looking for some peace and a break from the city bustle.  
Maybe he has other reasons like a bet or pride to prove something.... Pride ... mmh ...  
Pride is an armour that people wear to protect them from certain things. Pride can endure a lot, but also keep us from the things that seems important to us...

"Rustle"

A noise interrupts Seungcheols train of thought.  
Seungcheol turns slowly to the direction of the sound.  
"Mmm oh a red squirrel ... Unfortunately, these have become rare, because the gray squirrels continue to displace this species ..."

  
The said squirrel sits on an old oak tree and gnaws at a beechnut. Carefully he takes out his camera and tries to make no sound, because everyone knows how easily frightened squirrels are.

After five minutes he sits on a tree trunk and looks at his snapshots. He clicks through the pictures until he reaches Jeonghans picture, his face half covered by the hair and in the middle of fighting with the thorn bushes. On the whole, an amusing picture. Too bad his face is not seen too well. Only the thought of him brings unconsciously a smile on Seungcheols face.

The photographer sighs, he should not waste his thoughts on a person he will never see again anyway. He gets up, hangs his camera around his neck and continues his walk. The path is quite narrow, steep and overgrown by grass and plants. It‘s difficult to see where the path leads. To his detriment the air has become extremely humid despite the many trees around him, that shield the sun. After a two-hour march, he reaches a flat level.

The perfect place to set up his tent for the night. As Seungcheol just wanted to take his backpack down, he hears a familiar voice cursing.

“Damn, how does that belong together? Insert Part A into Part C and fasten it with the AB 1 straps. Parts A and C look alike. What is the difference? Can the other one fly or what? Who should understand that? I don’t build an Ikea shelf here. Shit tent."

Seungcheol approaches the familiar voice behind the slightly empty bushes. "Jeonghan?"  
The said man looks up annoyed and when Jeonghan recognizes him he snorts,"Oh my stalker is back."

"I'm not a stalker. I'm Seungcheol and I'm walking to the Devil's Rock Mr. I do not know how to set up a tent.” „Like I said Stalker that's my destination too and I know how to set up a tent. I take this part and the other part and put it together. See like that," Jeonghan snarls and tries to force those parts together.

Seungcheol only rolls with his eyes and answers, "Well, then I do not have to tell you that these two parts do not belong together." Jeonghan glares at him. "Oh, you are not just a stalker and a pervert, but also a smart aleck too." "At least I'm not arrogant and have character."

"Wait hold on. I'm not arrogant and I have a much better character than you. I am only cautious of strangers. It's like the little red riding hood and the bad wolf; you cannot trust anyone you meet in the forest." "What?"Seungcheol stares confused at Jeognhan. "Well you are the bad wolf that wants to eat me, the poor helpless little red riding hood. And for an idiot like you I don’t mean “eat” in a cannibal way." "... I think I should be more afraid. From which mental asylum have you escaped?"

"You idiot this is a metaphor. And I'm not crazy just because your literary understanding is not enough." Jeonghan glares at him.

"Yeah ... Whatever I'll go and let you set up your tent alone. I'm only getting insulted by you anyway, although I am only offering my help to you." Jeonghan looks down at the floor and murmurs a few words that are hard for him to say.

"Help me…Please... "

"See, it’s not that hard?" Seungcheol flashes a gummy smile at Jeonghan, who keep on staring at him.

„Is something wrong?" The photographer asks Jeonghan, who immediately looks away and answers.

"Nothing Loser."

Together they set up Jeonghans tent. "That would be done. Then I'm probably going to set up my tent now." Just as Seungcheol wanted to leave, Jeonghan holds him by the arm. "You can set up your tent here. Not that you misunderstand, I am not scared, but it's my first night out here in the nature and I'd rather prefer you stay here with me. Even if you really get on my nerves.“ Jeonghan stammers, while playing with his hands.

Seungcheol laughs, "With pleasure. We should also make a small campfire to cook small meal. I set up my tent and you are looking for some firewood. You can do that, right?" "I'm not stupid,"Jeonghan hisses and turns on his heels around and goes to collect some firewood. Meanwhile, he sets up his tent next to Jeonghans.

After half an hour, both are sitting at a small campfire and eating sausages. Slowly, the sun disappears behind the mountains and leaves a pleasant coolness.

"Why does my sausage look so charred?" Jeonghan asks, while staring at his burnt sausage. “That’s because you hold the stick with the sausage too deep into the flames. You have to keep your stick higher." Seungcheol explains and makes funny hand gestures. Jeonghan looks at him and chuckles. "You look so ridiculous. Just give me yours."

"Woah, you look really good when you laugh."

"W-h-a-t I always look good,"Jeonghan stutters and blushes slightly.  
"Here take it."  
"What?"  
"You wanted to have my sausage?"

Jeonghan stares at him wide-eyed, but in the end he suspiciously accepts it. “Thank you. Do not be so nice. Otherwise, I think the sausage has fallen on the ground or you spit on it." Seungcheol just shakes his head at this statement.

"Where are you from?" "I am from Solem. I work there as a businessman." Jeonghan replies indifferent.

"I see from the big city. I thought so already. I'm from Poisson."

"Oh, I think a good friend of mine is on vacation there. And what do you mean with I thought so already?" The other one asks annoyed.

"I wonder how he found about this dumbhole Poisson. You rarely see new faces there. Nothing at all, it has no meaning. Calm down. Do you live alone?" Seuncheol tries to change the subject before Jeonghan’s mood changes.

„So to speak, I live in an apartment with my half-angora cat Serengeti."  
"You have a cat? I always wanted to have a pet, but animals are prohibited in our house. That's why I bought a lot of plants. When you enter my apartment you might think you are in a glass house. All of my plants also have names." Seungcheol explains proudly.

"Wow and you said I was crazy. I talk with my cat, but with plants. I just imagine that I named my orchid Kevin or my aloe plant Peter. Hello Kevin, you look good today. Oh Peter, are you a little thirsty? Here's a bit more water for you." Jeonghan laughs. "Hey, I did not say that I talk to my plants. They only have names. I hope you have nice conversations with your cat. " Seungcheol jokes; turning his head in Jeonghan's direction and joins the laughter.

It is a quiet cool night; only the laughter of the two can be heard. "We have the best conversations. Serengeti listens to me and does not interrupt me." Jeoghan bent his legs, looks over at Seungcheol and their eyes meet.

Dark brown eyes stare into his. Seungcheol feels like time stands still for a short period, an eternity that lasts only a few seconds until Jeoghan breaks the eye contact and turns his head to the other side with a slight blush on the cheeks, unnoticed for Seungcheols eyes.

An awkward silence comes over the two. After a while Seungcheol whispers softly, "It's getting late, I should go to sleep. Tomorrow will be a tough day and I'm tired."  
"Yes, you're right that’s a great idea. I'm totally exhausted. Today I have walked so much I have never done in my whole life before."

Seungcheol gets up. "Then sleep well Yoon Jeonghan."  
"You too, Choi Seungcheol ..." Jeonghan mumbles and gives Seungcheol a half-hearted smile. Cute.

After he has finished getting ready for bed, he lies in his sleeping bag and closes his eyes. Yoon Jeonghan..mmh ... what an interesting person.

  
The sleep overcomes him and he drifts off to his dreamland.


	5. Euphoria blooms (Jeonghans POV)

**Day 2 Tuesday**

_At the beginning, the destination seems to be so far away…_

Jeonghan slowly opens his eyes. It feels like he slept for three years, but still he is so exhausted and his back feels numb. “ _What time is it?”_ The businessman gropes for his alarm, but feels nothing but emptiness next to him.

Then reality hits him and he starts to remember that he is currently on a backpack trip. Jeonghan groans at the thought of walking for many hours again today. His legs still hurt from yesterday and he does not even want to start talking about his back, which is only used to the softest mattresses than this hard ground where a sleeping pad isn’t much of a help.

What would he not give to snuggle in a soft bed with his cat right now?

Is this idiot of photographer, journalist or whatever he is already awake? With that thought, Jeonghan sits up, gets ready and changes his clothes.

In the End he fixes his camping hat and then he opens his tent. The bright morning sun welcomes him, causing him squint his eyes together.

„Goodness sun not so early in the morning.“ Jeonghan mumbles and looks at his wrist watch, which shows 8:30 am.

"So late already. Actually, I wanted to start walking an hour earlier so I could at least escape the miserably warm afternoon heat a bit. Well welcome salty sweat and sunburns,"he sighs and lets his gaze wander to Seungcheols tent.

Well where Seungcheols tent actually supposed to be.

Full of amazement written all over Jeonghans face; he rubs his eyes in disbelief. There is no longer a tent next to his and the fireplace has been removed. It almost seems like Seungcheol has never been here.

"That idiot. What is he thinking of just disappearing without saying goodbye or leaving at least a note behind. He could have written, "Hey Yoon Jeonghan wink smiley. I would like to thank you for your presence, without you my nights were so cold and lonely. I bet you look amazing right now. Like you always do, Yours Seungcheol" Jeonghan imitates his voice and then he hisses with a pissed face, while grinding his teeth. „I hope you choke on your camera."

"Saying goodbye is part of the decency and manners. In the end, Seungcheol is just a big loser who isn’t worth to waste even on more thought about." He lets his anger out on a stone by kicking it. A pain passes through his foot, causing Jeonghan to scream.

"Ouch. Shit. Stupid Stone." Today is not really his day.

He should really leave soon otherwise he will be standing here until noon and insulting stones. With a deep sigh he packs his tent and camping gear. At least taking down the tent is much easier and faster than setting it up. After 15 minutes he has everything packed.

"Hooray... Let's go and make friends with the nature then ..." Jeonghan mutters without any excitement in his voice.

Jeonghan walks exactly as the map shows. The path passes one tree after another. In his opinion, each tree he passes by is looking the same as the other. Fortunately, the sun is now covered by clouds, which makes the walk in the shadow of the forest really pleasant.

After an hour of walking, he slowly is losing his mind, all he sees are trees. It feels like he is caught in a never-ending loop because the path leads only through  trees, then trees again and again.

 "Quack" He looks down at the sound and takes a few steps back. Ugh how disgusting. There is probably no hope for our friendship nature. This will definitely not work out. In front of him sits a tree frog and stares at him with his big googly eyes.  He contorts his face in disgust. Slimy animals have never been his cup of tea. But somehow the frog reminds him of someone.

Who is it? Oh the eyes, they are similar to Seungcheols. Well the ridiculously long eyelashes are missing.

Ah Jeonghan stop that, stop thinking about the idiot. He says to himself and stomps past the frog. Yes, but comparing someone with a frog is an insult. Exactly, but why does Seungcheol appears in his thoughts since this morning?

Suddenly he hears something not far from him. Slowly Jeonghan approaches the sound, stops behind a giant spruce and hides behind the broad trunk.

 

Oh, speaking of the devil, there is Seungcheol, who is looking for something in his backpack.

Jeonghan watches the other man for little while. He is not a stalker; he is just interested in other people matters that do not concern him. No one knows what other people are hiding. There is a skeleton in every closet. And this guy seemed suspicious to him at the very first sight. He's like the nice neighbor next door who has dead bodies in his cellar.

Who in the world believes that guy is a landscape photographer and journalist?  Who is going into a lonely forest taking pictures of strangers and acting like the friendliest human being on earth, despite being a jerk? Something must be wrong with that guy and that's why he watches him. Jeonghan tries to persuade himself that this is the only reason, why he is watching Seungcheol.

On the other hand Seungcheol suddenly pulls up his T-shirt and reveals his muscular body. Jeonghan's grip tightens around the tree. What a sight his sweat-drenched wet hair smoothed back, his well-built arms, his half-undressed shirt revealed his abdominal muscles and the sunbeams that break through the cloud layers shine on him like spotlights. Someone should bring him holy water because his eyes have sinned. After ogling and drooling over Seungcheols body, he came back to his senses.

Shit why is this loser so hot?

When he could think straight again, he turns around quickly, but he steps on a branch, causing some noise. He tries to run away as fast as possible in the hope that the other man has not seen him. Maybe the photographer considers it to be an animal...

When he is sure that no one has followed him, he slows down his pace. His face has turned red like the shade of a tomato from running away and the latter would never admit the sight of Seungcheols half-naked body.

"How dare he to change his clothes in the middle of the forest. I knew he is a pervert and now on the top of that a nudist. Idiot," Jeonghan snorts totally out of breath.

Completely engrossed in cursing Seungcheol, he does not see the tree in front of him and collides with it.

"Ouch. I hate this guy. And nature …This day is shit…"he groans and his stomach growls.

"And I'm hungry, too" Jeonghan pouts, rubbing his forehead.

"I need a break. Ok Jeonghan listen. You'll eat something first and then you'll keep walking. Exactly, everything will go well according to plan."

After his self-motivation speech Jeonghan takes out an apple and a packaged raisin tea bun out of his backpack. He does not want to start a fire; because it takes a lot of time and he will build a fireplace in the evening. The apple and the raisin bun are enough for the time being.

Jeonghan sits down on a stone, leans back at the tree behind him and closes his eyes. A gentle breeze blows through his brown hair. Slowly his thoughts calm down and he takes a bite of his apple. The apple is really ripe that the juice trickles down his hands.

After he has eaten the apple he licks his fingers with relish and eats his raisin bun.

Meanwhile, Jeonghan lets his gaze wander through the forest. Maybe he will give nature a second chance. Next to a really tall fir some white flowers catches his eye. What is their name again? That should be windflowers. Jeonghan remembers the book Jisoo gave him for his birthday.

It’s called „The language of flowers“. Windflowers stand for sincerity and are a symbol of love.  
Jeonghan kneels beside the flowers to take a better look at them. They seem a lot smaller in reality compared to the flowers in the book.

He let his gaze drift further to white herbaceous flowers. These flowers should be called shooting stars or cow lips. These stand for rusticity, winning grace, healing, youth, lawlessness. From his point of view are Cow lips the knights among the flowers, at least their symbolism, meaning reminds him of a brave knight.

Full of amazement he goes over to the blue flowers on the opposite of him, they are called Squill. You should give these flowers to someone if you have made a mistake. Because the literally mean a whole sentence; I made a mistake, forgive me. The world of flowers is like a giant poetry band, you can tell a beautiful poem with a bouquet of flowers and the all hold a special meaning.

Enthralled by the flower world, Jeonghan continues his way. His previous complaints about all the negative sides of his journey fade more and more into the background and he starts appreciates the little things around him. The environment around him slowly gains more importance.

On his way he discovers the most diverse plants. One of them is ivy, which stands for affection and friendship. The way the ivy wraps around trees reminds him of an intimate embrace of a beloved one, what a meaningful meaning.

Or moss that covers stones, tree barks and the ground. Moss stands for maternal love, like a mother protecting her children; it keeps them warm and secure. How beautiful the meaning of flowers is. It is totally different to look at these flowers carefully and find out their meaning, than just take a look at the pictures in the book.

The businessman is surprised that he developed such a huge interest in this flower language thing. The only reason he read the book was because he got bored on a four hours train ride and he packed the wrong book.  The book has left not such a great impression on him. The pictures are stunning, but he would not read it again. But experiencing the pictures live is something else and much more interesting.

Not even in a thousand years would he have thought that plants would bring him so much joy. But he hopes he doesn't cross the border of a plant maniac by giving his plants names like Mr. Choi.

Totally lost in his new discovered world, he reaches a forest clearing. The forest clearing is covered with small blue and red flowers.  Jeonghan looks at his wristwatch it's almost 8pm full of euphoria he has forgotten the time.

A chill runs down his spine, it has become pretty cool. He carefully puts his backpack on the floor and puts on his jacket. Ah so much better, then he is scanning the area and decides that here is a good place to set up his tent for the night.

Miraculously, his tent was set up after 20 minutes. Who needs a loser to set up a tent anyway? What is he doing right now? Jeonghan wonders and then sighs. He should focus more…  
  
When he wants to eat something warm he needs wood to start a campfire. Therefore, he decides to wistfully search for firewood. It does not take much time until the campfire burns. A stomach growling reminds him how hungry he is. But what should he eat today; he remembers this packaged camping powder, which Minghao has pushed on him.

The salesman told him; the only thing he has to do is boil the water and then add the strange powder. In the end it should turn into food, hopefully.

Since the powder seemed to be easy to carry, he bought a few flavors from Minghao. Well Jeonghan could give it a try; he digs out a pot and fills it with water. It is beyond him to understand how this powder could turn into goulash, but no guts, not glory huh…

As the water begins to boil, he pours the powder in and stirs it a bit. After about 15 minutes it seems to be ready. Jeonghan cautiously moves the spoon into the brown broth and takes a little bit on his spoon.

First of all he judges the goulash on the spoon; it looks like diarrhea with weird clubs. Carefully and with a disgusted face, he tries a spoonful of goulash. Okay, he has to admit he imagined it to be worse, but before he starves, that's an acceptable alternative.

After finishing the meal, he cleans up and stashes everything in his backpack. The sky has turned pitch black, hanged with cloud covering all of the stars.  With a yawn Jeonghan feels the fatigue coming over him and lies down in his tent.

He snuggles deep in his sleeping back, but a feeling of uneasiness won’t let go of him. To be alone in the forest has a sinister side. Maybe he would not mind if Seungcheol were here like yesterday. Like the cowlip, a knight, who watches over the forest. Oh Jeonghan stop coming up with stupid metaphors, you'll survive the night without the idiot.  

It just feels lonely…to be alone…

If he looks next to him then there is no one; only his hand and an empty space.

What does it matter when he is at home?

What’s the difference?

Loneliness.

Why is this feeling overcoming him right now?

Maybe because he does not have any work that distracts him, so he can suppress this feeling of loneliness. Or because he had a lot of 

fun today and would like to share these memories with someone.

Who knows… Suddenly it feels cold.  
  
Jeonghan slowly falls asleep with these thoughts.


	6. A storm is coming (Seungcheols POV)

**Day 3 Wednesday**

_Only with small steps one gets closer to the destination._

 

Seungcheol walks along the riverside, while on clear sky the midday sun burns holes in his back. What would he do for just a few raindrops, but the only drops are the drops of sweat on his forehead running down his face. An uneasy silence surrounds the photographer. An unusual calmness; maybe it is the calm before the storm? It's a strange mood. The birds are not singing; no wind is blowing; only the rippling of the river can be heard.

 

Why does he keep ponder over so many things?

Since this morning; no, actually since yesterday night an event is always on his mind and won’t leave him alone. When he changed his clothing yesterday, he heard footsteps. Judging by the volume, it must be a very large animal. Damn it, maybe it was a deer, lynx or even a wolf. He would have loved to photograph one of these animals. Well the latter is dangerous, but if you are careful, keep your distance and have experience it won’t be a problem. Sadly, he could not find an animal when he looked for the cause of the noise or any footprints on the ground.

 

However, he is worried about Jeonghan. What if he encounters a dangerous animal? Seungcheol strongly doubts that the other man has any idea how to behave in such a situation. He would probably defend himself with a stick or run away. Or maybe he underestimates him like a cute cat, which can turn into a little beast that tears off a mouse head. Only at the imagination, shivers run down his spine, but Jeonghan with cat ears would be adorable. Seungcheol pinches his cheek he has no time for daydreaming now.

 

The river beside him catches his eye. Maybe he should catch some fish, it's already noon anyway. Slowly his gaze wanders down the river. From the distance, he recognizes a person. It is Jeonghan, who washes his hands in the river. A smile forms on his lips and he waves to him.

"JEONGHAN ..." calls Seungcheol, causing Jeonghan and the birds to startle in the forest. Now the birds make some noise.

 

Jeonghans looks up at him with an angry facial expression. But the only answer the photographer receives is a middle finger from the other. He could feel he died a thousand times a painful death in Jeonghan's mind. He just cannot help himself. Seungcheol really loves to annoy the other a little bit, maybe to annoy is the wrong expression to tease is more fitting. Seeing what facial expressions and reaction Jeonghan makes fills him up with excitement. Gosh that sounds so wrong...

 

He casually jogs to Jeonghan, who has not moved a millimeter. "Hey how are you?" Seungcheol tries to start a conversation. But Jeonghan averts his eyes from him and just snorts. Is he angry at me, but because of what? Seungcheol thinks a bit about what he might have done wrong. They really got along well in the evening the other day. Did he say something wrong? Or…

 

"Jeonghan are you sick?" The photographer asks worriedly.

"What? Are you stupid? "Jeonghan glares at him.

"No, I am just worried about you."

Jeonghan blushes for a moment and hisses, "You worried about me? Don’t make me laugh. If you are so worried you would have said goodbye."

 

Seungcheol stares at him dumbfounded and as he put one and one together everything falls into place. "Oh! Are you angry because I disappeared without saying anything? I left at five o'clock in the morning. I did not want to wake you up. I'm sorry. I thought you were exhausted and tired from yesterday’s walk. It was stupid of me not to leave a note or something. Please, forgive me my rudeness."

 

"Um," Jeonghan stares at him suspiciously, a little unsure how to react. He probably did not expect an apology from him. Why is he so cute? When Jeonghan finds his words again, he answers. "Whatever." No one speaks a word and an unpleasant silence falls over them until a question breaks the silence. "I just wanted to catch fish. Would you like to catch some with me? It's already past noon and you're certainly hungry" Seungcheol asks with a big grin on his face.

 

"Alright. If you insist, I will spare you some of my time," Jeonghan mutters and stands up. "However, I have absolutely no experience in fishing. Well, if you refrain from the one time when I caught a small fish with the landing net as I went with my parents to the sea."

 

"I'll show you," Seungcheol puts his backpack on the ground and takes out all the necessary utensils.

"Come, over there to the rock." Without any objections or teasing remarks Jeonghan follows Seungcheol to the rock.

"This is really is a good location for fishing. In addition, we have a little shadow here because we need a lot of patience now. Imagine being in the blazing sun for hours without moving."

"If you say so, it will probably be right."

"Stand there." Jeonghan nods and follows Seungcheols instructions.

"What now?" "Take the fishing rod. I've already got the bait on the hook." Seungchol puts the fishing rod into Jeonghan's hand.

 

"Now you have to hold the fishing rod like this." Seungcheol steps behind Jeonghan and holds the other man's wrist. Jeonghan's back touches his chest. His heart starts to beat faster. What's this? Is it because of the heat? He can also feel Jeonghan's pulse beating faster, as if the two hearts are racing for an unknown goal. From his perspective, he can see a faint blush on Jeonghans ears. Is he alright?

"Are you okay, idiot?" Seungcheol wanted to ask the same question, but Jeonghan pre-empted him.

"Um, yeah. I am fine." He let go of Jeonghans wrist and continues explaining.

 

After an hour, both were sitting around the campfire and grilling fish. "Never again ... fishing is too tiring and not to mention boring." Jeonghan complains as he waves his map like a fan to blow some cool air to him.

"I see. Let me ask you a question. The fish is really good, right?" "Sure it's very good ...What are you getting at?"

"What I am trying to say is that you do not get anything for free. For good things you have to work hard, but in the end you will be rewarded. Like fruits; you plant them, water them and take care of them until they grow up. The rearing needs a lot of work. But in the end they will bear plenty of fruit."

 

"Idiot, I stopped halfway listening to you. But if we already talking about plants,-." "Fruits are not plants," Seungcheol interrupts him. "Botanically, trees are plants and fruits grow on trees. So shut up," Jeonghan says, rolling his eyes," Anyway, yesterday when you left me alone without saying a single word, I have-"

 

"Goodness, I've already apologized; you do not have to mention it a hundred times." "And you could stop interrupting me, nasty nudist." "Why are you calling me a nudist?" Jeonghan seems to panic for a brief moment, but he manages to keep calm, ignores the question and speaks, "What I want to say is that I have discovered the flower world for me and therefore nature is a little bit more bearable ..."

 

Seungcheol looks at him. "I am happy that you found something in nature that you can enjoy." "Yes, I find it interesting to look at the flowers and find out their meaning. Maybe when I get back home I will visit the flower shop "Marys Wish", where I occasionally walk by. The shop is very cute, which has a vintage flair and it's also a cafe at the same time." Jeonghan speaks with a slight smile on his face. "What do you like about nature Seungcheol?" "You called me Seungcheol ... you're getting soft." The photographer chuckles.

 

"Don’t let it go to your head, idiot." "Yes, yes ... What I like about nature let's see. For me nature is a pole of serenity and a place where exploration never stops, because every place of nature hides their own wonders, just waiting to be discovered. You have to walk through nature with open eyes in order to let all the impressions affect you. But when you close your eyes serenity comes over you. A serenity and calmness that makes you forget the world for a brief moment. The clear air, the mountains, the wind-“

 

"That's enough; I did not want to hear a whole novel." Jeonghan cuts in before Seungcheol could finish his speech. "In short, nature calms my soul and tames my wild thoughts."

 

"Wild thoughts?"

"Just trivial worries, inner unrests ... they just go away ...when I close my eyes. Well at least for a short time."

"I wish it would work the same way for problems. By simply closing your eyes and they are gone," Jeonghan whispers.

"Are you having problems?"

"No, just annoying nuisances…I guess?"

"Am I an annoying nuisance?" Seungcheol asks, looking at Jeonghan. The other one stares at him in astonishment and giggles.

"Annoying Yes but a nuisance No."

"Really ..." He leans back against a tree trunk and examines his counterpart.

 

After a few minutes, Jeonghan mumbles, "Do I have something on my face or why do you keep staring at me for minutes?"

 

"I like the beautiful view in front of me."

For that answer, Jeonghan slaps him on the shoulder. "Idiot."

 

The photographer just laughs. "Ouch. It’s just a joke; there is no reason for you to become violent. However, I wondered if you would like to accompany me on my hike to the Devil's Rock? Well, it just makes more fun to travel together and I can- "

 

"Yes, gladly," Jeonghan chimes in again before Seungcheol can finish the sentence.

 

"Seriously? I thought you would say something like, "Are you stupid. Never in my life would I walk with a pervert like you. Only God knows how many corpses you have in your basement. Idiot!" Or "No thanks. Who knows what nasty ideas you have on your sick mind, what you can do with a helpless handsome man like me alone in the forest. I bet it excites you to watch my body helpless and trembling like a shy newborn fawn in front of an evil wolf. And now is the perfect chance to put these ideas into action." Or maybe an unexpected plot twist "Damn, Seungcheol, you look so good ... What if I get weak? When loneliness overcomes me in the cool night, are you going to hold me Seungcheol? Hold me tight, tight as- "

 

That earned him a stronger punch on the shoulder from Jeonghan.

 

"Do you want to die that badly? First, I'm not talking like that, so stop imitating me. Second, the last option you'll never hear from my lips this lifetime. Last but not least another stupid remark and I won’t honor you with my presence. Short you can walk alone," Jeonghan makes clear, eats the rest of his fish and stands up. "That's okay. You have a lot of requirements. What are you some kind of a prince or snob?" "What are you some kind of a loser?" Jeonghan shoots back.

 

“You can call me Seungcheolie and I call you Hannie,” Seungcheol grins as he gets up. "We are miles away from this level of friendship. If you dare to call me that, I'll hit you where it hurts even more,”Jeonghan snorts while his gaze continues to move down to the lower half of Seungcheols body. "Sure Jeonghannie ~"

 

"You wanted it that way ..." Jeonghan takes a few steps towards him until Seungcheols can feel the others breath on his skin. His eyes are looking deep in Jeonghans eyes again, but this time it is different than last evening when their eyes met. The mood feels electrifying somehow, but at the same time it feels unbearable as if only one wrong word could blow the fuses in one of them, causing all the emotions to break out.

 

"You said Hannie not Jeonghannie." Seungcheol whispers with a smirk on his lips.

 

"I probably said that." Jeonghan purrs into his left ear and then passes him, keeping the eye contact as long as possible. Jeonghan's words echo in his ear. His grin widens and he turns to Jeonghan. Damn, what a sexy flat butt.

 

"Are you coming or have you turned into one of your beloved trees, which are rooted on the same spot?" "Yes, wait. Let me go ahead you have no idea where you are going." Jeonghan stops and snarls, "Of course I know where to go. I've made it this far." "Yeah that’s right, but we came from this direction." Seungcheol says and points at the direction Jeonghan wanted to walk. "I knew that."

"Of course ...“

 

After a few taunts later, they come to a rise. Seungcheol looks up at the sky, which is now covered by large gray storm clouds. From far away one can already hear the thunder and see the lightning brighten the sky.

 

"Um, rain?" Jeonghan looks at him expectantly. "Yes, but maybe we can make it to the cave." The photographer points to a crevice not far from here.

 

"Then we should hurry up." Seungcheol nods. But luck isn’t on their side, after a loud thunder the rain just patters down. He sighs, grabs Jeonghans hand before the other can even protests. Together the run hand in hand to the cave, well rather Seungcheol dragging Jeonghan to the cave. Completely soaked and out of breath, they finally reach the cave.

 

"You can let go now ..." "Mmh?" Seungcheol has forgotten that he still holds Jeonghan's hand and lets the hand go immediately. "Sorry, do you have clothes to change? Otherwise you'll catch a cold."

 

Jeonghan wipes a wet strand from his face, before he answers, "Of course I have clothes to change.

I'm not running around with the same clothes for seven days. I also have my hand cream, toiletries, lip balm and more along with me. I mean, if I have to walk for miles and sweat like a pig, at least I want to look good."

 

"Oh, that's why your hands are so soft. Don’t worry you would also look good if you have to wear a garbage bag." "Yeah I know I look damn fine all the time. Seriously, using hand cream would not hurt you either. Your hands are a little rough." "Really?" Seungcheol asks, staring at his hands.

 

Jeonghan, on the other hand, puts down his backpack and takes dry clothes out of it. Seungcheol does the same. "Hold on a moment. Turn around ..." commands Jeonghan.

"Why? We're both men?" "Still, I'm embarrassed, so turn around," Jeonghan glares at him.

"Okay, but I cannot guarantee that I might peek over my shoulder."

"But I can guarantee a blue eye if you look."

 

Seungcheol just laughs and turns around. Jeonghan does the same. Now they stand back to back. Both men change their clothes. Perhaps he secretly and unnoticed stole a glance over his shoulders and admired Jeonghan's white milky shoulders, his back, his long legs, each of his perfect body proportions. But he could swear Jeonghan did the same.

 

When both are done, they lay out their sleeping bags next to each other. "You are far too close" the businessman protests. "It’s because the cave is too narrow. You are so petty. Just think it’s a sleepover party."

 

Jeonghan cuddles in his sleeping bag. "A sleepover party is for children and young people. Not for old men like us."

"Old men?  Don’t do me dirty like that. I don’t know about you, but I am not that old. How old are you actually?" Seungcheol asks, feeling a bit offended being called old.

"Really, you're not that old? You look like someone who has plenty illegitimate children everywhere in the world. Back to your question I'm tender 24 years old." "Now you are mean again. Oh me too. When's your birthday? " "Why are you asking so many questions? My birthday is on 04. October 1995."

 

"I see then I am older than you, because my birthday is on 08.August 1995. You seem to be an interesting personality, that's why I ask so many questions. There are many things I do not know about you, it is like an undiscovered landscape waiting to be discovered. And are not human contacts based on knowledge of each other?  These questions were just superficial; I want to know more about you who you are. Not like some employees or wannabe friends who are only interested in keeping up a good image. In order to follow social norms, one wishes a friend a happy birthday, just to maintain a social status of a good friend. Probably the only know that today is your birthday, because social networks remind them."

 

"That sounds kind of stupid." "So please, tell me something about yourself."

Jeonghan sighs, "Alright, I'll tell you something about me. It was when I was about eight years old. "

"What happened there?" Seungcheol asks as he lies down in his sleeping bag and looks over at Jeonghan.

 

"Well. I had a fight with my little sister. We both wanted to play with the same teddy bear, but I had it first. My mother blamed me because my sister is much younger and I should be more considerate towards her. She also thought that I was too old to play with teddies anyway. Then we yelled at each other. I got angry and ran away from home. Please, don’t think badly about my mother. She was just overworked, stressed and tired at that time. Since my dad left us, she worked in three different jobs and she often came home late. "

 

"Really? I am sorry to hear that. And then?"

 

"Do not interrupt me all the time. So I ran away from home and then came to a playground. The playground was surrounded by high walls, but the gate was open so I went in. Then it began to rain heavily like today. To avoid getting wet, I crawled into the crawl through tunnel. It was so cold."

 

"Does the story have a punch line?"

 

"Be quiet or I will not continue to tell the story. Where did I stop? Ah yes. An eternity passed, the storm had no intention to stop and instead the storm became stronger and stronger. At that time I was afraid of thunder and lightning. I curled myself up like a ball of wool, hoping that the thunderstorm would finally end. For some reason, I could not stop crying and screaming. As if somebody had opened my tear sluices and the dammed up water poured out with an unstoppable power that tears everything along. My whine was suppressed by the thunder and rain. Suddenly another child stuck his head through the tunnel and screamed "Kamehameha". I just thought what an idiot, he was drenched from head to toe, but he made me laugh. The boy wore a weird superhero suit that consisted of a noodle colander as a helmet, an old flowered sheet as a cape, red leggings, over it yellow and white dotted underpants, a white t-shirt with the red letter J. He showed me both thumbs up and said "Mission fulfilled". Goodness he looked so ridiculous and so I met my best friend Jisoo. You see the story was boring ..."

 

"Not true at all. I think the story is interesting. It shows me different side of you." Seungcheol laughs and ruffles through Jeonghan's damp hair.

"After that we talked for hours in this tunnel until the rain stopped. Maybe we can become friends too... " 

"I do not want us to become friends." Seungcheol mumbles so quietly, inaudible to Jeonghan.

"What did you say?"

"Sleep well Yoon Jeonghan." Seungcheol whispers and closes his eyes.

"Oh. Sleep well too Choi Seungcheol." Jeoghans whispered words accompany him into a deep sleep.


	7. Another day to get to know you (Jeonghans POV)

**Day 4 Thursday**

_ Looking back, one does not see the beginning and, looking ahead there is no end in sight. _

 

Jeonghan wakes up from his deep sleep. He reaches out next to him to turn off the alarm clock, before it gives him a hearing loss. Old habits are hard to get rid of, because man is a creature of habit. Still with his eyes closed, he gropes next to him. It feels really strange, so warm and muscular. Suddenly he pauses. Goodness, why is he out of it every morning lately? 

 

"What are you doing?" The man beside him mumbles. "I thought you were my alarm clock ..." 

"I feel like an alarm clock?" Seungcheols murmurs sleepy. "No. Forget it." 

"Then maybe you could take your hand off my belly, please?" 

 

"Uh ... yes." Immediately Jeonghan pulls his hand away and turns around in panic in the other direction. His heart is beating fast. Is he getting sick? 

Jeonghan pull yourself together. Carefully, he sits up and rubs his eyes. Next to him, he hears a loud yawn. His gaze wanders over his shoulders to his traveling companion. Right now he would really like stroking through Seungcheols black bed hair. The hair looks so fluffy. And he only wears a tank top. 

Jeonghan what are you thinking?

 

"Jeoghan are you alright? Your face is completely red. Are you sick?" Seungcheol asks worriedly and leans forward so that the older ones face is a few inches from his. Carefully, Seungcheol touches Jeonghans forehead with his hand. 

The younger man looks up and turns red. "Everything's fine ..." Stutters Jeonghan and pushes away Seungcheols hand. 

 

"I'm just hungry ..." The photographer looks at him distrustfully and backs away. "You're right, we skipped dinner yesterday. My stomach growls too. "

 

"Is an apple and a packaged chocolate croissant enough?" Seungcheol asks as he rummages through his backpack. He only nods as he watches every step of the other man. 

"You do not have to be so suspicious I will not spit on your food or give you dog food." "You can never be sure ..." he replies. "Does this look like dog food to you?" Seungcheol teases as he fiddles the apple and a packaged chocolate croissant in front of his face. 

Annoyed, Jeonghan snatches the food from Seungcheol.

 

"I do not know if it's just me, but I have not heard any thanks."

"Can you be a bigger jerk? Thanks." Jeonghan hisses irritably. 

So early in the morning he has no desire to quarrel with the loser. He is still fantasizing about to shove the food down Seungcheols throat and hope he chokes on it. 

Why is he getting on his nerves so much? His mere presence drives him mad. On the other hand he also wants to know more about him. Such a dilemma. 

 

"Are you just thinking about how you want to kill me?" Seungcheol interrupts Jeonghan's train of thoughts. "Yes." He answers curtly and opens the packaging to the chocolate croissant. "I thought so. The Look in your eyes told me. Should I pour you a cup of coffee? It is a shame to call this broth coffee but it fulfills its function to keep you awake." "Um, no thanks..."

 

"Well then no coffee. However, instead of always thinking about how you want to kill me, you might think about how we can get along with each other." "I often think about killing you, but not always. Why I often think about it is because you are so intolerable and annoying to me all the time. Besides, we understand each other well. We are just not showing it." Jeonghan speaks with his mouth full. 

 

Seungcheol just laughs. "So playing hard to get is the way you are showing that you like someone Hannie." As soon as these words have left Seungcheols mouth, Seungcheol face meets Jeonghan's chocolate croissant packaging paper.

 

Jeonghan glares at the other man. The photographer raises his hands as he would surrender. "Okay I'm an idiot." "That's exactly what you are. Glad you know it yourself"

 

Seungcheol does not reply and eats his apple. Meanwhile, the sun is rising up behind the mountains. It almost seems like yesterday was never a storm.

"Today the morning dawn is really beautiful. In the city you can hardly see the dawn because all the skyscrapers and smog are blocking the view," Jeonghan whispers as he watches the orange-pink-colored sky. 

"Yes, the dawn is pretty and cool, so we should start walking soon, before it gets warmer." "It sounds good to me."

 

After the two have finished their breakfast, they pack their stuff and set off. After a good half-hour walk, Seungcheol suddenly stops and kneels down. "Is there something?" "Yes, take a look." Seungcheol speaks, pointing to something at the ground. Jeonghan stares at him questioningly with a raised eyebrow. The black-haired man rolls his eyes. "There are footprints on the ground." 

Carefully he pulls Jeonghan down to him. "Look."

 

"Which animal does these footprints belong to?"

"The footprints belong to a red fox, which must have its burrow nearby. Usually they come out at night. But since it rained heavy yesterday they have to be from this morning. " 

 

"Wait there are foxes in this forest? Oh my god." 

"Where do you think foxes live? Foxes live in the forest."

 

Jeonghan turns slightly red and speaks, "Of course I know that. When I was a kid I had a picture book "The animals in the forest" so I already have a certain general knowledge about forest animals. I also had picture books "My Pets and Me", "Discover the Farm Animals", "African Animal Safari” and a lot more." 

 

"Definitely, that qualifies you throughout as an animal expert,” Seungcheol chuckles. Jeonghan is getting annoyed by the other and pinches his cheek. "Ouch you are always so rough." The older complains as he strokes his cheek.

 

"Oh, let's take a chance." 

"Take what? What nonsense are you talking?"Jeonghan sighs irritably. 

"Well, the meaning of the white violets, you said you like the flower language." 

"Ah, I see. Just say that from the start. I am surprised that you know the meaning. Let's take a chance, huh, " Jeonghan says in a lot friendlier tone than before. 

 

"It's hard to believe but I know a few meanings of flowers. Would you like to take a picture of them?"

"Yes sure. If you show me how it works." A few seconds later Jeonghan holds Seungcheols camera in his hands, while still kneeling down.

 

"Okay listen, you're holding the camera like this." 

Like the time when they were fishing, he can feel Seungcheol coming closer and slowly guiding his hands. This closeness and warmth, the way he is holding his hands, his breath at his ear is making him feel things he shouldn’t.  Jeonghan can feel his cheeks burning when Seungcheol scouts even closer.

 

Did this loser never heard of privacy? Slowly he suspects that Seungcheol does this on purpose. But if he is honest with himself then he cannot deny that he likes it a little bit. Not that he would ever admit it.

 

The brown haired bets that Seugncheol takes pleasure in teasing and making him flustered. Okay, Jeonghan stay calm. Breathe deeply in and out. Two people can play this game. With a mischievous smirk on his face, he leans back into Seungcheols arms and purrs. "Seungcheolie I think I'm holding the camera wrong?" 

 

"Wh-at?" Seungcheol stutters completely caught off guard. The older tries hard to keep his composure. "I said I think I'm holding the camera wrong." Jeonghan whispers in his ear with a low voice as he leans back further. "Jeonghan wait, I-" Before Seungcheol could protest, both fell backwards as Seungcheol lost his balance. "Ouch"

 

"At least I landed softly ..." Jeonghan mumbles with slightly blushing cheeks. "Yes, on me. Could you get down? You're heavy. " Seungcheol growls with red ears.

Jeonghan simply ignores the request and turns around so he can rest his chin on Seungcheols chest and whispers, "Where's the Please?" 

 

They stare at each other for a few seconds until Seungcheol throws Jeonghan of him, who lands on the hard ground. "On the ground I suppose." 

 

"Wow you're so mean and nasty. You bully. That hurt a lot," the older man just laughs at his complaints, then the photographer gets up and pulls Jeonghan with him. 

"You're always making fun of me." "It's not true. I'll do anything for you." 

Zero to one for Seungcheol. This bastard may have won this round, but the game is not over yet.

 

"Idiot,"  Jeonghan snorts and takes a picture of Seungcheol, where he makes a grumbling face expression and then giggles, "Oh, a grumpy bear." Seungcheol pokes him on the forehead and takes the camera out of his hand. "Let's continue walking." Jeonghan smiles slightly when he realizes that Seungcheols cheeks are slightly reddened. Perhaps it is still a draw.

 

They walk until late in the afternoon without breaks, except for a small lunch break. On the way they only had a short dispute, because Jeonghan wanted to take a break and Seungcheol said they only had a break 20 minutes ago. Otherwise, they got along well. Maybe it's because Jeonghan was too breathless to argue. 

 

"Ah, I am so tired. How long do we have to keep on walking?" Jeonghan groans. "It is not far until we reach a small lake. We can set up our tent there. I think we'll probably be there in ten minutes." "Probably? " "In ten minutes we will reach a lake for sure." Seungcheol corrects himself. 

"If we do not reach the lake in ten minutes, then you have to carry me. I keep an eye on the time." "Sure ..." 

 

Fortunate for Seungcheol the lake comes in sight after few minutes. 

"Oh, I can already see the lake," Jeonghan breathes in relief, "Finally I can rest, because Mr.Petty was so stingy with the breaks and we only stopped when Mr.Petty wanted to take a picture." 

"All I wanted was for us to reach the lake before sunset so we can swim a bit." The other defends himself. "MMh whatever..." 

 

The two reach the lake. Immediately Jeonghan puts down his backpack and lies down in the grass. "What a blessing. Loser set up my tent; you said that you would do everything for me." 

"Now I regret that I said that. We can sleep in the same tent. There is enough space for two people. " Seungcheol suggests. 

"Yes sure. Do whatever you like." Jeonghan answers, who listens to Seungcheol only half-heartedly.

 

"......... .."   
  
Wait, what did he just agree to? Keep calm Jeonghan. If he chickens out now, Seungcheol will definitely make fun of him. Just imagine it's like yesterday in the cave.... But a tent is much narrower. Okay, we're both grown-up men, so pull yourself together. 

 

"Are you really sure that you are okay or why are you tearing the grass out and murmuring some weird stuff? Shall I enroll you in a mental hospital?" "Huh?" Jeonghan stares at the tufts of grass in his hand. How the fuck did they get in his hands? "No ... um ... I'm weeding ... idiot." 

"Natural Grass is not a weed..." Seungcheol states, while setting up the tent. "Jerk."

 

As Seungcheol puts up the tent, Jeonghan's eyes hang on each of his movements. "You probably like watching me." The black-haired smirks. "In your dreams. I just like to watch you suffer." Jeonghan hisses and sticks out his tongue.

 

"Finished. Does my Lord have any objections to go swimming in the lake with me?" 

"I have no objections.  Are you planning to go swimming in underwear? I do not have my swimming trunks with me." "No, I meant naked, we're both men. Who cares?" Jeonghan stares at him in horror. "I'm just joking, of course in our Underwear. I did not think that you are so prudish."

 

Jeonghan boxes him in the shoulder. "Idiot." "I know that you would like to see me naked. You're just acting shy." Jeonghan grimaces in disgust. "No thanks. Between both of us you are the pervert and I know you desperately want to see my naked body."

 

"What makes you think so? Do you think you're so irresistible?" 

"Yes I am. I know that I look damn good." 

"What a pity; I can't disagree now," Seungcheol teases as he pulls his shirt over his head. Impudently.  Jeonghan has to pull himself together not to goggle at the other, because he doesn’t want to give the photographer the pleasure he has the upper hand over him. Stay in the game Jeonghan.

 

He does the same and takes off his shirt. In the corner of his eye, he sees the other grinning like a moron. Jerk. Slowly Seungcheol pulls down his pants. He is so thick in contrast to Jeognhan, who has a rather slim and athletic figure. Jeonghan follows him and takes off his pants; at least he wears red underpants without pattern. Seungcheol unexpectedly wears a pair of black underpants; he would have expected he would wear some underwear with funny patterns. 

 

"You know, I'd like to slap your butt to give it an existence, because your ass is so flat." Seungcheol, who has already taken off his sandals, pulls him out of his thoughts with that statement. 

 

"Hello? I have a great ass and since you noticed my wonderful ass I would ask you not to look at it. At least I do not run around with an ass that needs a hazard warning lights when you go backwards." Jeonghan snorts, while he takes off his shoes too. 

 

Seungcheol laughs, "People say that I have a great booty. Since you do not understand the magnificence of my butt, I suppose you probably cannot think clearly because of the heat and you urgently are in need of a cooling down.”

 

"Sorry, what are you- "Before Jeonghan can protest Seungcheol has already raised him over his shoulders."Let me down SEUNGCHEOL or I'll bite you and kick you." 

"I like it when you bite me." 

"You kinky pervert."  But Seungcheol just laughs, runs to the lake and throws Jeonghan in water. Jeonghan can feel how the cold water suddenly hits his skin. Immediately he dives up to the water surface. 

 

"You're lucky it's deep here and I didn’t get hurt." Jeonghan hisses, brushing a pair of wet strands of hair out of his face. However, he talks with the nothing, because far and wide there's no Seungcheol to be seen. Although he turns around in a circle, but there is no sight of the black haired male. "Seungcheol? SEUN- "Jeonghan yells as suddenly something wraps around his body tightly and pulls him down into the water.

 

The businessman tries to get away, but without success. In vain he tries to see something in the water, but his view is so blurred that he can only recognize black hair. But he does not have to think twice to know who the culprit is. Seungcheol that bastard. Again he tries to break himself free by kicking around him, but he accidentally opens his mouth and inhales. Immediately he feels the water running down into his lung and nose. Seungcheol notices that something is wrong with Jeonghan and dives up. Jeonghan begins to cough heavily, while holding onto Seungcheol's neck. "You * cough * are such a *cough* idiot." 

 

"You must have inhaled water. I'm so sorry. Are you alright? "Seungcheol lets his hands glide down Jeonghan's waist and Jeonghan wraps his legs around him. What is he doing… But he is so exhausted and his knees are getting weak. Jeonghan calms down and his coughing slowly stops. "As punishment you have to carry me now.“ Jeonghan pouts with a hoarse voice. 

 

"Where should I go carry you?" Seungscheol whispers as he leans backwards letting his body floating over the water. "Mmh Where to I wonder?" Jeonghan mumbles while he buries his face in Seungcheols shoulder. Why is he so weak? But it feels so comfortable like a cradle they are floating on the lake, the cool water, the pleasant wind blowing through his hair. Gorgeous. Slowly Jeonghan's eyelids become heavy and he dozes off to a light slumber.

 

"Jeonghannie ... dinner is ready." A soft voice calls him and a gentle hand caressing his head. "Mmmh?" Jeonghan opens his eyes and sees Seungcheol above him, his hair is wet and pushed back so that his forehead is visible instead of his split hairstyle; a great view. 

 

"You fell asleep. That's why I carried you out the water and let you rest. In the meanwhile I cooked dinner." Seungcheol informs him and offers him a hand, which he willingly accepts and lets himself be pulled up by the other. 

 

"What is for dinner?" 

"Curry, but not too spicy, because I can’t handle spicy food well." 

"Sissy." Jeonghan teases and sits down at the campfire. "Whatever. Would you like a can of beer?" 

"Sure, why not? If you already have beer with you, it would be a waste not to take one. "

 

The older man thrusts him a can of beer and a paper plate full of Cury in his hand. After Seungcheol is seated, they are toasting their cans with each other and start eating. 

"Tell me something about your childhood, last time I just talked." 

 

Seungcheol thinks for a while before answering. "Let’s see. I often got into trouble at school. It was a pretty small preschool; we shared it with the neighbouring town, which has been the rival of my hometown since generations." "It sounds kind of stupid." 

 

"Well, it's a bit stupid, but it goes back decades. First, you need to know that our neighbouring town has a screw loose somewhere. There the houses on the left side must be painted yellow and on the right side red. And they are so petty about boundaries. For example, if a tree on our side grows just a millimetre on their side, it has to be cut. They also insist that the border fence has to be repainted every year." "Goodness, they sound like terrible neighbors nobody wants."

 

"You said it. As already mentioned, this dispute goes back decades. According to a legend long ago, the leader of my village and their village were twin brothers. Once it was a small country ruled by their father. One day, the father of the two decided to divide his land into two parts and drew a boarder in the middle of his land. He gave the left side, my hometown, to the oldest of the twins and right side to the younger one. The younger one thought his side was smaller than his brother's side, so he urged his father to measure the two areas. As the younger did not stop making a fuss, the father gave in and everyone was ordered to measure their land by making one-meter steps until they reach the border. Shortly before the measurement of the land was over, the father passed away. In the end, it can be deduced that the land of the younger one was 10 steps smaller than the land of his brother. Both twins were too proud to give in and a quarrel arose. And since then there is a relentless rivalry between the two towns. "

 

"I thought the reason was more valid... It sounds like a storyline from a bad drama."    
  
"The world is crazy. Most disputes are about little things. Wars were the countries fight because of a few meters of land, money, proofing some stupid points or maintaining the honor. Crazy, right? But back to my story. The school and the hospital are the exception; both towns have agreed to share these two, because of financial reasons. The local people call these neutral areas. " 

 

"Sounds like you also have war zones."

 

"Actually, we live quite peacefully, as long as everyone stays on their side. Well, except for the tournament. Each year the school holds a one week event, a tournament between the classmates of the neighbouring school and my home town.

I can tell you one thing to call this a tournament is a beautification, it almost verges at war. You can imagine what a disgrace it is to lose to the other town. There's nothing like oh don’t worry it’s only a tournament. The loser must hang up the neighbor’s flag of the winner for a year. Especially for the elderly, it is an embarrassment and dishonor. Well I once hung our flag on the statue of their former leader. That gave trouble... " 

 

"Wow; that something like this is possible in our time..." "Well, that's probably because nobody cares about our towns anyway. I did not just behave mischievously all the time. Back then I was class president then even school president. So I think that I have some sense of responsibility in me." Seungcheol jokes, while looking at the lake.

 

"Well, I'd follow you. You seem to be good at guiding other people, even if you're an idiot sometimes. I miss my school days. If you go through a large alley you can reach my old school, which is separated from the city by huge walls. Inside the walls the yard is laid out like a park with trees, colorful flowers and a little pond. It was almost like going from one world of concrete blocks to another, leaving all the problems behind. It was a nice place to learn. I always belonged to the best students. In my school I was always in the top 10, was popular and had great friends. You do not believe it, but I visited the Volleyball Club for a while, but I prefer to sleep when I have free time. That's why volleyball did not work out for me. "

 

"Oh volleyball, I played basketball with my friend Mingyu back then. But Mingyu got kicked out, because he is really clumsy and I did not want to continue without him. He is tall, but his clumsiness is another level. Then we joined the art club and so I discovered photography for myself."

 

"Mingyu? The name sounds familiar to me." 

"Really?" 

 

"Yes, but I guess it's just a coincidence there are a lot of people with the same name. Mingyu right? He must be a good friend. From my schoolmates only Jisoo remained, with the others the contact was lost over the years. Real friends are hard to find. But over the years I have found good friends mainly at my university and work. There is Jun, who is not easy to understand, but takes good care of everyone even if he does not show it openly. Soonyoung and Seokmin, that Prankster duo, the two are always in a good mood and cheer you up if you are down.  Jisoo, who is like a gentleman but really a complete dork, but with him I can talk about everything. And last but not least, Wonwoo, he looks serious, but he is a cinnamon roll. Oh and Chan, he is new in the company, but he is already my baby. "

 

"Jisoo sounds familiar to me since yesterday and Wonwoo too, but probably as you said there are several people with the same name. Thanks for the kind words, except for the idiot. Honestly, I admire you with what fondness and affection you speak about your friends. Despite your proud façade, you are truly a benevolent person Yoon Jeonghan."

 

Jeonghan blushes and whispers, "Do not say that ..." The dinner is slowly ends with trivial talks. After they cleaned up, they go to sleep in their tent.

 

„Sleep well Seungcheol." Jeonghan mumbles. "You too Jeonghan."   
  
It feels good to have someone next to you. Jeonghan looks over to Seungcheol, who has already fallen into a deep sleep. Mr. Loser must be really tired. 

 

A smile forms on his lips. Idiot ... what are you doing with me...


	8. Let's make a wish (Seungcheols POV)

**Day 5 Friday**

_There is a time one gets lost on their way._

 

Habits shape our everyday life. Every person has a habit, which the one unconsciously pursues. Some people have a habit of staring at other people. But who can blame them, when their counterpart is so special, so beautiful, so unique. Every human being is somehow unique and no one is the same as the other person. They are like unexplored areas, which you slowly discover with your eyes and slowly get to know them.

Normally the photographer feels awkward to stare at others for too long, maybe Seungcheol is way too tired, but seeing Jeonghan as the first thing in the morning is somehow satisfying. Jeonghan looks so calm and pleased, like cat curled up lying on a sofa. His brown dishevelled hair lies gently on his face, which is turned in his direction and his mouth is slightly open. After another ten minutes, Seungcheol feels like a stalker or as Jeonghan would say a pervert.  


The black-haired man sighs and wonders how he could get out of the tent without waking up Jeonghan. To achieve this he hast to climb over the other man first and then opening the loud zipper from the exit. Carefully Seungcheol crawls forward, as soon as he is in front of the businessman, he raises his right leg and brings it to the other side. Now he is over the other in a somewhat misleading pose.

Wow, right now he hopes Jeonghan will not wake up. The younger one would definitely totally misunderstand the situation. He is still too young to sign his own death warrant. Therefore, as carefully as possible, he brings his left leg to the other side and crawls to the exit. Now to the hardest task is to open the zipper as quietly as possible. After eight minutes of concentration and patience, he is finally outside.

He takes a quick look at his watch which shows 4:30am. Lucky he did not wake up Jeonghan, because he feels that the other one is even more peevish in the morning than usual. Getting out of the tent has caused him to sweat and he decides to go for a swim in the lake.  
  
After he has disposed of his clothes, he slowly drifts into the lake. Seungcheol feels the cool water hit his hot skin. He dives down for a moment to wet his hair and to wash his face. Now he is definitely awake. The photographer swims a bit further in the middle of the lake before turning on his back and floating on the water. He closes his eyes and tries to fade out everything around him, but since yesterday many things and thoughts preoccupy him.

Especially one person doesn’t leave his mind, Yoon Jeonghan.  Maybe it's because the farewell is approaching soon. Today they will reach the Devil's Rock and the next day their ways part. Jeonghan goes back to the train station and he walks a little further to a natural mountain plateau called heavens door, but he doubts that Jeonghan has a clue yet. It makes him sad to know that the journey together will be over soon. He would like to walk together with Jeonghan the same way a bit longer, maybe a few days, weeks, months, years, ... forever. What is he thinking?

In the course of the hike, he discovered that he might like Jeonghan very much. This affection does not arise from friendship but out of love. They just became friends, maybe it is better to keep his feelings for himself and allow the two of them to have a nice ending. He does not want Jeonghan to look back and be reminded of his feelings for him. Perhaps the other would politely refuse, but deep inside, Jeonghan would be disgusted with his feelings.

Even if it is difficult for him he should not read too much into the touches, the playful teasing and flirting. Actually, Seungcheol never wanted to be friends ... But he does not want to see Jeonghan sad or disgusted because of him.

It's better this way.

Maybe he's just scared to learn the truth. Running away is always easier than facing the danger.

The growling of his stomach breaks his train of thought and he swims back ashore. His gaze wanders to the tent; Jeonghan still seems to be sleeping. He should make himself useful and prepare a delicious breakfast.

Seungcheol thinks for a while what he could prepare for breakfast and decides to go for pancakes and coffee. When buying durable food, he bought a pancake batter to stir. You just have to sprinkle the powder with water and you have a pancake batter. But first he heats water for the coffee, and then he prepares the pancake batter and makes some pancakes out of it. At the end he pours the coffee into two cups.

As silently as possible he approaches the tent, carefully opens the zipper and then kneels beside Jeonghan. With care, he strokes Jeonghan's cheek and whispers softly, "Get up Jeonghan, breakfast is ready."

"Mmmh?" Jeonghan mutters and shows no sign that he will get up anytime soon. "Jeong-" Suddenly, Jeonghan's hands wrap around his neck and pull him down.

"You've become even fatter Serengeti." The younger one purrs completely sleepy, while caressing Seungcheols hair.

"Why is your fur so wet?" With these words, Jeonghan opens his eyes and immediately turns red. "What are you doing pervert?" Jeonghan growls. Seungcheol blushes and backs off as fast as possible to avoid the other hitting him.

"I just wanted to wake you up, because the breakfast is ready." He stutters embarrassed. "Oh really? I- um-um, I'm coming. Wait outside I'll change my clothes. " Jeonghan gives the order as he tries to avoid eye contact with him. Seungcheol nods and follows Jeonghan's instructions.

As Seungcheol takes the first step out of the tent, he feels his heart pounding. It almost seems like his heart is about to explode anytime soon.

"Calm down Seungcheol". He breathes in and out and tries to keep a clear head. The black haired man sits down on a stone and waits for Jeonghan.

After about ten minutes, Jeonghan sits next to him and mumbles, "Good morning."

"Good Morning. I prepared coffee and pancakes. I hope you like pancakes."Seungcheol speaks and gives him a cup of coffee. Jeonghan nods and takes a sip of coffee.

"Wow that tastes like someone with worn car tires drove over this broth a thousand times. Just disgusting...." Then the businessman tries a piece of pancake. "However, the pancake is acceptable." "I told you yesterday the coffee does not taste good, but it fulfils its job and keeps you awake. Yes the pancake is ok. It would taste better with fresh ingredients, but is quite passable. "

"After this coffee I need ten liters of Listerine Mouthwash. " Jeonghan complains, while staring at his coffee cup. "I don't force you to drink it."

The other just rolls his eyes and continues to eat his breakfast.

They finished their breakfast and then both pack and clean up everything together. In the meantime the sun is slowly rising over the lake they get on their way.

After a two-hour walk, Jeonghan complains and starts poking Seungcheols shoulder softly, "Let’s take a break. I think I am dying, my feet hurt and every step feels like I'm walking over lego blocks. You are a sadist who enjoys watching other suffer. Asshole."

"You have been complaining for over an hour now.  How can someone be so annoying? But fine, when you finally shut up. Let's just take a break over there at the little stream and let our feet dangle in the water a little bit." He suggests completely annoyed by the other, then pushes gently the others hand away to prevent the younger one from poking him further.

"Finally." Jeonghan says with a triumphant smile and immediately takes off his shoes.  Jeonghan seems to be a person who knows he can get everything he wants, when he remains persistent. As if the world lays at his feet.

Afterwards, the brown-haired man sits down at a rock on the stream bank and let his feet dangle in the water like Seungcheol suggested. The older one does the same and sits next to Jeonghan.

"It feels good to cool the feet in water."

"Yes, it feels nice. “ Seungcheol agrees as the cool water touches his feet.

"That reminds me ..." Jeonghan takes his backpack and rummages around until he finds what he is looking for and pulls out a pack of gummy bears.

"Gummy bears? You like sweets?"

Jeonghan looks at him as he is about to open the packaging.

"Yes. I love sweets. As a kid, I ate sweets every day. Most of the time I went to a little old candy store after school. I think the name was Memento and the logo was a black cat. I wonder if the shop still exists, since you can buy sweets in every convenience store. You will not believe it, but I have never had a hole in the tooth,"Jeonghan says who finally got the packaging open and offers Seungcheol some gummy bears. He gratefully accepts it and speaks.

"You seem to be a lucky person. Jeonghan, we will reach the Devil's Rock today in the late afternoon."

"What, really that was fast. I'm curious how the rock looks like. I have only seen it in pictures so far. The Devil's Rock is said to be the most beautiful at night. I hope it is a clear night without rain or clouds."Jeonghan smiles at him. How much he hates to pull the mood down, but it's better to tell Jeonghan now that the farewell is approaching soon.

"Jeonghan the next morning, we walk a bit together until we come to a signpost, than our ways will part. Your way leads back to the train station and mine a little further up to the heavens plateau. You have to work again on Monday, right? " Seungcheol explains, while in the corner of his eye, he can see Jeonghan smile fade and the other looks down sadly.

Jeonghan does not answer for a while until he finally talks to Seungcheol and with a compulsive smile on his face, "Then at least I do not have to wake up the next morning and see your stupid face." Seungcheol does not know what hurt more Jeonghan's words or his sad look.

"I know you will miss me."  


But there is no answer coming over from the other lips.

They walk for a while, but many words do not fall between them. In the evening they reach the rock. Due to the constant breaks, which Jeonghan insisted on, the arrival has been delayed a bit. He has given in, because Jeonghan is moody the whole time since they have continued their way from the stream.

Jeonghan is already at the rock. The devils rock is a huge rock which rises at least twenty meters into the air. The rock is pitch black and smooth, so the setting sun is reflected on the rock. Nature is a strange spectacle full of miracles and hidden secrets. Seungcheol would like to explore all of it. He makes his way to the rock and halts in front of the other.

  


Seungcheol places his hand on the rock next to Jeonghans, who only looks up at him. Slowly he makes a step towards the younger one, who instantly takes a step backwards. The game keeps repeating itself and again and again, so they go around the rock like in slow motion without breaking the eye contact even once.

Meanwhile, Seungcheol explains. "The locals have a legend that when you put your hand on the rock, it fulfills you a wish. The rock is supposed to come from outer space. According to stories, a meteorite was said to have struck here many years ago. The lake in which we swam should have been created this way. Only this rock is a fragment of this meteorite. And if you lay your hand on the rock and make a wish, it should be carried through the rock into the wide universe and come true.”  
 

Jeonghan stops and Seungcheol a few inches in front of Jeonghan so that their hands almost touch each other. Jeonghan closes his eyes and Seungcheol does the same.

Seungcheol makes a wish, but the wish he locks away as a secret deep inside his heart.  
  
"Did you wish for something?" Seungcheol asks and opens his eyes, but Jeonghan is no longer beside him. He looks around and finds the businessman lying in the meadow.

"Yes I have and you? “ The younger one whispers softly and it seems he is about to doze off every second.

  
"Yeah, I made my wish already.” Seungcheol takes out his camera and takes some pictures of the rock. "Jeonghan, what do you think of it when we spend the night outdoors? The night should not be so cold and there should be a magnificent starry sky tonight."

"Mmh sounds great."

"Well then it's decided, so don’t fall asleep yet."

"Then entertain me loser. I am hungry and in a bad mood."

"Oh, I already realized that." Jeonghan glares at him and he came to the conclusion it’s better to remain silent.

"Let’s cook together." Jeonghan tells him bluntly out of the blue.

"I did not expect that. What do you want to cook? "

"Let's see. Stew?"

"Well, we could somehow manage that."

They both compare the food they have left and then start cooking.

„Seungcheol nobody cuts onions like that and stop crying.” Jeonghan laughs at his miserable attempt in cutting onions and takes the knife from his hand.

"Peel the potatoes." Seungcheol is happy that the other is in a better mood and answers, "Whatever you wish, my Lord."

"Well-behaved, today you are very obedient."

"I'm always obedient."

"Are you a dog?"

"I am?"

Jeonghan just laughs and Seungcheol joins him. After they have cooked and eaten, they lie down in the grass.

"Wow the starry sky is incredible," Jeonghan whispers and points at the night sky.

Seundgechols eyes follow Jeonghans hands like a signpost to the firmament. The pitch-black night sky is filled with stars impossible to count them all and a veil of purple and orange surround the stars.

"Look over there you can see the Summer Triangle and the three brightest stars Altair, Deneb and Vega…"

"Wow in the city you rarely see such a clear starry sky. And what is that over there? "

"That? Stars? I need to admit that I do not know much about astrology, but I know a few stars and constellations." Seungcheol confesses and glances at Jeonghan.

"But the brightest star is Sirius."

"Tell me Seungcheol; are our ways really separating tomorrow?" Jeonghan asks a little bit unhappy. "Yes. But if you want, we can exchange our mobile phone numbers tomorrow."

"I have already suppressed that I cannot use a mobile phone. Before I left, I turned off my phone and stuffed it in my backpack. The funny thing is that I do not miss my phone. I never thought that I could endure it for so long without a mobile phone. However, it would be really nice if we could stay in touch. You are not that bad as I first thought. You are not that bad as companion as I first thought. I have to admit I had a lot of fun with you,"  Jeonghan smiles at him a little bit happier than before.

"Yes ..." Seungcheol murmurs only. Why is he doing this? Out of sight, out of mind one say. However, he does not have the heart to let Jeonghan go completely out of his life. It makes him happy to know that the contact is not completely lost.

"If I'm writing something wrong or we're discussing something, then don’t run away and block me." "I will not do that idiot." Jeonghan chuckles and leans his head against Seungcheols shoulder. He wishes this moment to last forever, but he knows that after the night the next morning follows. The night and day must really love each other if they are constantly pursuing each other. The sad thing is that they never meet.

"It would be nice, if the time stood still and be frozen forever." Jeongan interrupts the silence with a few whispered words passing his lips.

"Can you read minds?"

"Only your mind, because you are an idiot and it’s easy to read. Maybe we had the same wish."

"I do not think so."

Why are both of them beating around the bush?

There's a short break before Jeonghan answers. "Yes you are right. It's the same with people names. There are many names some are the same but the person is another the same applies to wishes." "What do you mean?" Seungcheol asks leaning his head against Jeonghans.

He can feel Jeonghans breath on his neck.

"Let's say two people wish they were together forever. This is the same wish but the meaning is different. One person wishes to be with the other person out of love and the other out of friendship."

"That's sad," Seungcheol replies, "And what is the chance that two people have the same wish."

"As low as being struck by lightning."

"But as long as there is a chance, anything is possible." Seungcheol whispers and closes his eyes.  

He is so tired and exhausted from the walk and his constant fight with his emotion.

"Sleep well Choi Seungcheol and dream of me." Jeonghan breathes and cuddles to Seungcheol, who slowly falls asleep and whispers. "You too, Yoon Jeonghan.”


	9. Dead man walking (Jeonghans POV)

**Day 6 Saturday**

_ One has to overcome a lot of obstacles on their journey _

 

What is this warmth? Such a pleasant warmth, not a warmth in which you have to sweat buckets full of sweat or a warmth like bathing in the morning sun, rather someone holding him tight as if his life is in danger. No evil or malicious might can do him any harm as long as the other arms hold him tight. How he would like to be forever a prisoner of this embrace. It feels like, how, how was the word again? Ah yes, security. Is this a dream or the reality? Whatever it may be he wants it to last forever. But for now there is no forever.

 

Jeonghan slowly opens his eyes and the first thing he sees are two big eyes watching his every step like a hungry predator and he is his prey. Yet, the eyes of the other shine and shimmer as if the universe were reflected in it. How did he end up in this situation? He lies on Seungcheol's chest and stares deep into the other eyes. 

 

What is he doing right now? He just cannot stop it. Jeonghan feels like he's losing himself in Seungcheols eyes, lost in a maze with no exit in sight, unable to escape. Everything looks so hopeless. He loses himself deeper into his feelings for Seungcheol, it seems to him both run in a circle and the exit always moves far away. Why is it so hard to confess, to say it out loud? Is it his pride? Is it the fear? What should he say at all… But the most important thing is what Seungcheol thinks about him…

 

He sinks deeper and deeper into the quicksand of his feelings the more Jeonghan fights against them. How long has the other been watching him? The businessman did not plan on falling in love with someone when planning the trip. Hell, he did not even consider that he meets a hot guy alone in the nowhere.  Jeonghan did not even notice how this idiot slowly captured his heart. And Seungcheol does not even seem to think of giving it back to him, as kind and considerate the older one behaves, and he even admires the part of how Seungcheol acts like the greatest loser and idiot.

 

"Would you like breakfast?" A deep warm voice breaks the silence. 

"What?" 

"Are you hungry? Would you like to have breakfast?" Seungcheol repeats and whispers then, "  Are you alright?" 

 

No I am not. After a deep breath he lies, "Yes, I am fine. Mmh breakfast sounds great ... " 

Seungcheol carefully lifts Jeonghan up and gets up. It seems like the warmth is drifting away from him and only leaves a bittersweet coldness behind.

 

"What does my Lord want to eat today?" "Everything your cooking skills can offer." 

"I have to disappoint you, my cooking skills borders between edible and total disaster."

Jeonghan smiles, "Mmh fruit salad, croissant, French Toast and freshly squeezed orange juice." 

"Do not demand the impossible from me. But I have an idea so let me surprise you." 

"I can hardly wait. Wake me up when it's done," Jeonghan mumbles and closes his eyes. 

“Fine, I'll do that." With these words he hears Seungcheol slowly moving away.

 

Why does he feel so empty?  He feels his eyelids get heavier and he drifts into a light slumber.

 

"Jeonghanie ~" 

 

"Mmh?"

 

"Breakfast is ready“, whispers a soft deep voice and the person the voice belongs to gently strokes his cheeks.

"Seungcheol?" 

"Yes?" 

 

"Help me up." As soon as Jeonghan finishes the sentence someone pulls him up with his hands. "Come, follow me." Seungcheol doesn't wait for a response, but drags Jeonghan along with him without letting go of his hand.

 

"Slow down. I barely get my eyes open and you're already dragging me around... "Seungcheol stops suddenly and speaks,  "We are there anyway. Ta-da. "

 

Jeonghan rubs his eyes and looks down. There are two plastic bowls full of yoghurt are placed on a flat stone, which supposed to replace a table. The yogurt consists of various fruits and berries, such as chopped apples and pears, blueberries, strawberries and blackberries and crushed walnuts or hazelnuts are sprinkled over it. He cannot say for sure what kind of nuts these are without tasting it.  Next to the yoghurt are waffles, most likely packaged waffles that Seungcheol has just taken out of the packaging. There is also a plastic cup with orange juice there. 

 

The food looks good and the older one has made an effort to collect fresh berries for him. This thought triggers a fluttering feeling in his stomach.

 

The businessman begins to giggle and presses the older ones hand, "Seungcheolie, you have put in a lot of effort preparing the food." 

"You scare me. You have been so friendly since yesterday evening." 

 

Jeonghan lets go of the other's hand and sets down. "You're an idiot." Seungcheol looks confused, but laughs the matter away and takes a seat next to Jeonghan. "Thanks, loser for the breakfast" 

"My pleasure my Lord." 

"You always look for a fight, right?" "Do I do that?" 

 

"Yes," Jeonghan mumbles as he dives the waffle into the yogurt and takes a bite of it. He must admit the waffle with the yoghurt tastes good. The yoghurt, the fresh berries and fruits give the whole a light and fluffy touch. The nuts and waffles complete the whole meal. 

 

"Does it taste good?" Seungcheol asks, while he tilts his head and stares at him. The brown-haired boy blushes slightly and stammers a short answer, "Yes." 

"Glad you like it ..." Seungcheol smiles faintly and turns his eyes away from Jeonghan and begins to eat.

 

The breakfast is fairly quiet, as there are no remarkable words are spoken other than the usual small talk. Maybe it is because neither of the two can find the right words to speak and are not able to start any conversation that does not end in an awkward silence. In addition, there is a tense tension between the two, which makes the situation even more uncomfortable.

  
After the breakfast both pack their things together.

 

"Then let's say goodbye to the devils rock. After that we will walk for about an hour until our ways part," Seungcheol speaks as he stretches his arms. 

"Goodbye Rock. Maybe if you're bored you can fulfill my wish," Jeonghan says with a sad look, waving goodbye to the rock. 

"You can also be incredibly cute." "Be quiet idiot ..." 

 

Seungcheol whispers something, but Jeonghan cannot understand what he's saying. 

"I cannot hear you, you should speak louder." 

The photographer stares at him and flashes his stupid gummy smile. 

"Let’s go Jeonghannie." Seungcheol may laugh but in his eyes he can detect a hint of sadness. 

"Sure ..." 

 

One thing Jeonghan is one hundred percent sure is that what Seungcheol said was not what he really whispered. 

 

Liar.

 

At a slower pace than usual, the two go on. At a slower pace than usual, the two go on. If you look at it from a logical point of view, it only makes sense, the closer they get to their destination, the sooner they will reach it.

 

Secretly, Jeonghan wishes he would be stuck in an endless loop and they would never reach the destination. However, running away forever is not a solution and is not helping him in any way.

Why is everything so difficult? 

 

But it is better this way, that he goes back home and continue his usual daily life. Wow how quickly his mind changed from the beginning of his journey. He wanted a change in his usual everyday life, but now he wants to return to ordinary life where nothing was complicated. Maybe it's easier to go the easy way and avoid the confrontation than to face the change and the following complications.

 

Maybe the time has come to accept that he is like most humans a creature of habit. He is only human too. To get up every day, drive to work, quarrel with clients and incompetent interns and then arrive home completely exhausted. When you arrive home there is no one there. No one there ... 

 

Jeonghan sighs. 

 

"Why did you go the long way to the devils rock? If you had walked the path from the train station to the signpost you would have walked only an approximately for four hours," Seungcheol asks, disturbing his thoughts. 

 

He takes a while to collect his thoughts before he answers, "Because the road is much steeper and I wanted to walk more than a day." 

 

"I see."

 

And again a silence takes over them. Jeonghan feels like a dead man walking, he is the criminal and Seungcheol is the jailer who accompanies him. It is a difficult walk to the signpost. After one hour the two reach the signpost. 

 

"There we are ..." whispers Seungcheol. 

"Yes ... we were here faster than expected." 

 

"Um, well, it's time to say goodbye." These words are causing a piercing pain in Jeonghan's chest. 

 

"I guess it is idiot ..." 

 

"Jeonghan..." 

 

"Yes." Jeonghan looks at him wide-eyed, but all the words Seungceol wants to say do not seem to come over the others lips.

 

"I-" Seungcheol begins to speak while he looks around as if he's looking for the words he does not find until he focuses his gaze on Jeonghan and ends the sentence with a weak forced smile,"Take care of yourself. It would make me sad to know that you cannot find your way home without me. "

 

Jeonghan does not answer. Both just face each other and are searching for the right words to say. But his mouth does not want to cooperate with his heart and he decides to keep silent. It's better if he goes now and leaves everything behind. 

 

With that thought, he closes the distance between Seungcheol with a hug and the older one immediately wraps his arms around him. 

 

Jeonghan buries his face in the other shoulder and mumbles, "When you reach the heaven plateau, you will certainly think of me, because it will remind you of angels. Heaven and angels make sense. And now I'll tell you a secret, because Yoon Jeonghan is an angel. So you will think of me." 

 

"What? Angel. Don’t you think Devil suits better? " Seungcheol breathes in his ear and leans his head against Jeonghans. 

"Hmm. The devil used to be an angel." 

"Then I'll probably think of you. I can't escape you Yoon Jeonghan."

 

Jeonghan pauses a bit in that position and later hopes to recall Seungcheols smell of forest and sweat, the warmth of the other. Enough Jeonghan the time has come to go. 

 

But before he could speak, Seungcheols voice sounded. "Jeonghannie Goodbye. Maybe I'll miss you a little bit."

 

"Yes, goodbye to Seungcheolie…"As soon as these words are uttered, he feels Seungcheol slowly slipping away from him and the warmth with him.

 

Again this icy coldness overcomes him. Is that what one calls loneliness? Maybe he was hoping that Seungcheol would say something, but it may be better that way. He casts another glance at the photographer, who tries to maintain his smile that does not exist on his face. 

 

Jeonghan sighs and turns on his heel. 

 

The brown-haired man cannot stand watching the other looking at him like that and takes his first steps forward. It's better that in the end he just misunderstood Seungcheols kindness as love to fill in the gaps left by loneliness. 

 

Oh how desperately he tries to convince himself. 

 

In running away we are all good. Right…

 

Even though he cannot see it, he feels Seungcheols eyes burn holes in his back. Jeonghan remains silent, because how can he believe that among billions of people Seungcheol loves him. He is afraid of knowing the truth. How can a broken heart heal if it is never broken? But why does he feel like he is dying inside?

 

With every step it feels like someone is ramming a knife into his heart over and over again. How can you fall so deeply for someone in such a short time? Usually he is the one who makes fun of such people and now he is the one. Why is it so hard to overcome his pride and fear? How can a person feel so much pain? So many thoughts and questions obscure his mind; he cannot think clearly anymore.

 

Jeonghan does not know how he did it, but completely exhausted and emotionally drained he reaches the train station. The train station is empty and lifeless; it resembles exactly what he feels inside him.

 

It is late afternoon and the train approaches the station soon. The businessman does not care, what is he anyway? At the moment he is just a shell which is full of emotions. Right now he would love to bang his head against the next wall and hope that his questions get less and the pain stops.

 

Calm down in a week everything will be forgotten...

 

Slowly the train arrives. When he gets on the train, he discovers that his train compartment is almost empty. If there had been as much noise as on his first train ride, he would not have been able to guarantee that he would not lose his nerve and everything ended up in a bloodbath. Totally tired, he sinks into the seat. His head hurts and he misses the idiot, although he just decided a few minutes ago to forget the looser. 

 

Maybe they are both fools who do not know what's good for them...

 

When talking about idiots; he should write Soonyoung a message to pick him up. He turns on his cell phone, dials Soonyoungs number and listens to the annoying dial tone. Then it suddenly hits Jeonghan like a bullet and he lets his hands sink down.

 

„OH, JEONGHAN YOU FINALLY ARE BACK? THANK GOD! SAVE US, WE ARE DROWNING INTO WORK. EVER SINCE YOU LEFT A TOTAL CHAOS HAS TAKEN OVER HERE. “

 

Tears run down his cheeks.

 

„Jeonghan?“   
  


Suddenly all the emotions that he tried to suppress are breaking out of him like an overpowering

stream of water. Whatever he tries, he cannot stop the tears from rolling down.

 

"Are you crying? Are you alright? Jeonghan? "

  
With a trembling hand, he lifts his phone up and stutters between his sobs.

  
"W-e for-go-t to ex-cha-nge our p-ho-ne nu-mb-ers."


	10. Dead End (Seungcheols POV)

**Day 7 Sunday**

_Slowly the end comes closer whether you give up or reach your destination._

 

Transience, the word is our constant companion. Our life is transient. The life of humans is like a flower. They grow from one seed to a beautiful flower, where no one is alike; each one is unique in its own way. However, with each passing day they become older until they slowly wither and return to earth. In the hour of our birth we are all the same, as well as in our last breath, where we find our end in death. This is how we pass slowly.

If we sometimes see no end, it does not mean that there is no end. All things must pass… transient....

 

Like this breathtaking view. Seungcheol stands on the sky plateau and watches as the sun rises slowly over the landscape of Beatitudine and envelops it like a veil in warm colours. A magical moment that would have brought a smile to his face a few days ago, but today he does not feel like laughing.

 

Nevertheless, this moment is transient. What a pity since he prefers the word eternity. In the end he comes to the conclusion that transience must be for realists and eternity for dreamers.

But what is he?

 

In his melancholy he listens to the howling of the wind, which blows so strongly that he believes the wind would sweep him of his feet in any second. Seungcheol spreads his arms like two huge wings to feel the wind. Since the dawn of mankind humans dream to fly.  Just to take off and fly away; leaving all the worries and responsibility behind. Take the easy way out...

 

Wings and flying, this reminds him of angels and Jeonghan.

 

Jeonghan is such a mean and selfish person. All the way to the Sky Plateau the other has claimed his thoughts for himself. Everything he did, what he saw, everything reminds him of Jeonghan. Even now, the last one does not leave his mind. When he remembered that the two had forgotten to exchange the numbers he cried out of rage. The only thing that gave him hope and some certainty for a reunion has slipped out of his hands.

 

At night Jeonghan robbed every second of his beloved sleep. On the day of parting, he was blinded by sadness as if he could have thought clearly. Now every trace of Jeonghan will slowly begin to vanish out of his live. Only deep cuts and scars will be left behind. Thinking back to the past moments of Jeonhans laughter, his snippy comments and this chance he missed put him in an angry state about himself.

 

You only know what you had when you lost it.

 

The fear and the pride are the biggest realists of all who build a thick wall to protect their weaknesses and their own fragility. Stupid and cowardly, that's what he is. How can his heart be so broken, even though he has not even confessed his love or experienced any kind of rejection?

 

Is it the uncertainty?

 

Damn, maybe he should have been a dreamer. An eternity with Jeonghan would have pleased him better than this lingering pain and yearning. Even if the reverie is in a fight with reality and the reality tries to make life difficult by all means to keep you away from achieving your dreams, there is still a way to let dreams come true. Not to give up, but to take this difficult road first is the hardest step.  The chances of an eternity are so small and there are many risk factors. One of them would be rejection but then at least he could have put an end to chasing after Jeonghan. Now he will always walk through the crowd and his eyes will automatically look for Jeonghan hoping to see him again.

 

Maybe it's okay to be selfish. Only this one time he would like to be self-determining. Only this one time. He has to tear down the walls of his pride and fear in order to seek his desire. What does he know about Jeonghan?

 

Seungcheol closes his eyes and remembers.

 

_„Where are you from?" "I am from Solem." „And You?“_

 

Seungcheol takes a deep breath and yells into the void, "Damn. Yoon Jeonghan If you can hear me then get ready. I'll come to you and I'll claim all of your thoughts, seconds, everything from you for myself. I will steal your heart from you and occupy it for me, whether you like it or not. Our meeting will not be transient or chasing after wind. I'm going to Solem and I am going to find you, because I really, really love you."

 

With these words he puts his plan into action. In a hurry, he packs his things and makes his way to the station. Completely out of breath he reaches the station around noon. He has never walked so fast in his life, but he is eager to find Jeonghan and make things right.

 

First, he checks the timetable. The next train will arrive in an hour. Seungcheol has to buy a train ticket anyway and so he looks out for a ticket counter. Unfortunately, he cannot find a ticket counter, but he sees a sign at the small station shop. "Tickets are available here." He enters the small convenience store, which apparently sells tickets and all sorts of other things.

 

The shop reminds him of the shop at Poisson central station. The shelves are crammed, it is a complete mess and the store is very cramped with the all the shelves. The only difference is that this shop is decorated with sailor things. Above the counter, which has the shape of an inverted small rowing boat, hangs a lifebuoy, next to it a figurehead of a mermaid, the curtains are blue and all sorts of odds and ends such as shells, sand and much more lies around as a decoration. At the cash register sits an elderly man who smokes a pipe and grins at him with a cat like smile, at the same time the others eyes following every movement of his.

 

"Good day, young man," The old man croaks.

"Hello ..." mumbles Seungcheol and squeezes himself through the shelves to the old man.

"You sound a bit depressed. Love? "The shopkeeper speaks and stares at him as if he could read his thoughts like a book.

 

"Yes, you can say so... But I am on my way to make things right. Anyway, it's not your concern, so don’t worry. I would like a ticket to Solem."

 

"To Solem? Is your love there?"

"Yes I hope to find my love there."

"That's crazy. Solem is a million city, that's like looking for a needle in a haystack." The old man laughs.

 

"Even if the chance is so small, as long as there is a chance, it is possible." Seungcheol answers determined.

 

"You are right. That brings back some memories. I used to be so determined when I was a young man. There was even a time when I chased after my love too. In the true sense of the word chased. Do you see the picture up there?" The old man points to the black and white image behind him. The picture shows a young man in sailor clothing with a big smile on his face standing on a boat.

 

Seungcheol nods and the old man continue, "At that time I sailed after my love with this boat. Back then there was no train connection here and cars were expensive. Ah her name is Farfalla, a beautiful woman. She was a merchant’s daughter who travelled with her family from place to place. Anyway, I also missed my chance to say what I feel for her. But I had such a big heartache, so I decided to go after her and went by boat across the sea to look for her. "

 

"Let me guess she's your wife now."

"No, when I found her fourth years passed, she was married and had two children."

"Wow, that's motivating me really..." Seungcheol sighs. The old man laughs and continues to talk.

 

"Well, the story is not over yet. In the third year of my search, I met my wife Aicha. You know three years are a long time, but I have never forgotten any facial features nor the smallest detail and nature of Farfalla. Still, when I met Aicha it was different. Suddenly all my wounds and pain that I felt from my chasing love started to heal slowly until Aicha got my sun and every one of my thoughts turned around her. Then step by step I began to forget Farfalla. In the fourth year we met by chance. But when I saw her, there was no more love, because my eyes only see Aicha."

 

At the last words, he can see the old man smile slightly and his eyes start to shine.

 

"You are a hopeless romantic. I hope I find my love because at the moment everything is filled with my sweetheart."

 

The old man laughs. "You’re the right man to speak. Who is chasing after their love now? Do not be discouraged by my story. If you are looking for something you have to find something, so do not worry. Just never give up and you'll find what you're looking for. There is always a treasure in the end. Why don't we have a beer together until your train leaves? By the way, my name is Kai."

 

"You don't have to say that twice. My name is Seungcheol. "

 

After forty minutes, Seungcheol says goodbye to Kai and gets on the train to Solem.

  
The train is almost empty and he quickly finds a seat. However, the closer he gets to his destination, the fuller the train becomes. After a while they finally reach Solem. Meanwhile, the train is crowded and he has trouble squeezing out of the train.

 

The photographer has not been in a big city for ages. Everywhere hectic masses of people, he feels like an intruder in a beehive. The passing people dart derided glances at him, maybe it's because his camping clothes. Seungcheol probably should change his clothes first. He does not want to attract much attention, and of course to impress Jeonghan, when he finds him. The operative word is when…

 

Seungcheol walks away from the crowd, walks down the street for a while and then enters the first clothing store he sees. When he looks around, the expensive prices catch his eye. No wonder that the saleswoman glares at him and hopes that he will leave soon. Well he really does not look like someone who has a lot of money with his dirty pants and wrinkled shirt. But as a renowned photographer and journalist he has a little more money, not that he wants to brag about it.

 

Seungcheol grabs the best shirt in lilac, black pants, some cool necklace and black shoes. He tries the clothes on, looks at himself in the mirror and goes through his black hair. „You look good, like a boss everyone wants to submit to, " he says to himself in the mirror and turns to the saleswoman

 

"I take everything and pay with card."

The saleswoman immediately changes her unfriendly facial expression into a hypocritical smile when he has pulled out his credit card

 

When he looks at his watch it indicates 18:00 clock. To start looking for Jeonghan now would not make sense. With a sigh, he decides to look for a hotel for the night.  The next morning he will be rested and prepared to begin his search for Jeonghan.

 

 

**Day 8 Monday**

 

As soon as he has stepped out of the hotel door, he already is greeted by a cloud-covered sky and hectic people, who almost over run him. Anyway, today nothing can take the grin out of his face, because he is determined to find Jeonghan. He knows it will not be easy, but he has to stay positive. But where should he start?

 

The photographer thinks for a while until he sees flowers in a vase at the cafe on the other side of the road.

 

Flowers. Jeonghan likes flowers.

 

_„Maybe when I get back home I will visit the flower shop "Marys Wish", where I occasionally walk by. The shop is very cute, which has a vintage flair and it's also a cafe at the same time.“_

 

"Mary's Wish. Mmmh ... " Seungcheol murmurs to himself and grabs the next best office worker by the wrist. "Excuse me sir. I'm looking for a flower shop named Mary's Wish." Seungcheol explains to the men he assumes is an office worker, because of his attire. The man wears a navy blue suit, a fancy Rolex, a white shirt, and when he looks closer at the other man he admits the stranger is really good looking and may also have Chinese roots. Of course, in his eyes Jeonghan is still the most beautiful human being in this world.

 

The businessman stares at him in astonishment and irritation, before he straightens his hair, clears his throat and answers coldly. "You just have to go down the street until you come to a railroad crossing, cross the railroad crossing and then turn left until you come to a riverbank. From there, walk along the river promenade until you see an electric shop on the right side, then turn right and walk down the street. On the left side is the flower shop. It takes about 20 minutes to get there. "

 

"Thank you very much, you helped me a lot. Goodbye."

"Good riddance." Seungcheol releases the others wrist and Businessman storms off. Who hurt his feelings? Was he rude? However, he has better things to do than worry about the hurt feelings of an office worker. At the moment, finding Jeonghan is his top priority.

 

In order to achieve that, he follows the instructions of the grumpy office worker. First he walks down the street for about five minutes until he reaches the railroad crossing. Luckily the railways gates are up and he can cross the tracks without further problems, then he turns right.

 

Seungcheol continues to walk along the riverbank. On the left side huge birch trees rise up, giving shade to the promenade against the blazing sun. It is a very pleasant and silent walk, because except for a few jogger and people who take their dog for a walk, almost no one is passing by. But he has no time to enjoy the silence. Seungcheol has to be careful that he does not run past the electronics store.

 

After ten minutes, the photographer sees the electrical shop. He was worried he had already missed the shop. At the shop, he turns left and goes down until he finally sees the sign Marys Wish above the wooden entrance door.

 

A smile creeps on his face, when he thinks about that Jeonghan could have been here and saw exactly the same sign as he did.  That he might have stood exactly at the same place and looked at the hanging basket with the different shades of red geranium hanging down from the sign. God he is getting more and more lovesick and desperate with each passing second.

 

The flower shop is exactly as Jeonghan described it; small and cute with a vintage flair. As he can read from the sign there really seems to be a small coffee in the courtyard of the flower shop. But before he enters the flower shop, he scans his surroundings in the hope that he may see Jeonghan. But there is no sight from his love. With a sigh he opens the heavy wooden door of the shop.

 

As soon as Seungcheol enters the room he is almost suffocated by fragrances, various flower scents and the smell of freshly ground coffee flow together. But not that these would be unpleasant, the scents seem somehow are reassuring. Seungcheol lets his gaze wander around the shop. The flower shop is rather small and the flower arrangements, cut flowers, bouquets, flowerpots and much more are on wooden vintage shelves, which give the whole shop a certain cuteness and dreaminess. Overall the whole shop looks aesthetically pleasant for the eye.

 

"Can I help sir? You look like you're rooted to the spot. "A raspy woman's voice takes his attention. He turns to the voice and sees a petite little middle-aged woman who wears much too bright red lipstick and tied her blond obviously colored hair to a messy bun.

 

"Yes, I'm looking for ..."

 

"For flowers? We have sunflowers, lilies, dahlias, orchids, oh and of course our bestseller roses. We have roses in various colours. Red, white, blue, burgundy red, bright red, -"

 

"Wait, I'm not looking for flowers."

"What do you want in a flower shop if you do not want flowers? Oh, I got it, you heard about our coffee. Yes, our coffee really something incredible. We have different roasted coffee beans, which of course are also for sale. So we-"

 

"No miss. I'm looking for a beautiful person who occasionally passes by here. He is a man in his early twenties with brown long hair framing his pretty face, about my size, and very handsome. Besides, he is slim, perfect proportions, breathtaking-"

 

"Our orchids are currently on sale only half the price."

"Oh come on Miss, help me out."

"All right. Do you have a picture?"

"Ah, wait a minute."

 

Seungcheol digs his camera out of his camera bag, he left the larger backpack at the hotel, and then he shows her a picture of Jeonghan.

 

"Oh, he makes a funny expression and his face half covered by hair, but looks damn good anyway. If I were ten years younger and not married, I would have stolen him away from you," The florist stops for a moment, checks out Seungcheol before she continues, and smiles at him, “Well, you would not have been a bad catch either, but I have to disappoint you, I cannot remember seeing him ever in my life."

 

"A pity, I thought, because he likes flowers and talked once about your flower shop that he might have stopped by."

 

"Someone who appreciates flowers is in my view a good person. So do not give up." The woman winks at him.

 

"I certainly will not." Seungcheol speaks and looks disappointed to the ground. He must look for another clue and digs around in his mind for a helpful memory.

 

_„So I ran away from home and then came to a playground. The playground was surrounded by high walls, but the gate was open so I went in. Then it began to rain heavily like today. To avoid getting wet, I crawled into the crawl through tunnel. It was so cold.“_

 

The playground. "Miss, can you tell me if there is a playground here with quite high walls?"

The florist thinks for a while and answers "Wait a minute."

 

She suddenly disappears into the room behind the counter and comes back with a city planner in her hand. The florist takes a pen and draws something on it.

 

"Take this city planner with you. I think I might know the playground you descripted. I used to live in the area and often went there with my kids; they are already going to the university now. The playground has extremely high brick walls for a playground. I marked the most important points. So you should find the playground without major problems. I hope I could help you."

 

Seungcheols eyes begin to shine. Out of joy he hugs the lady shortly, who is completely caught off guard by his action and gratefully accepts the city planner.

 

"Thank you. This will help me a lot. Then I'm on my way. Ah, and I would like to take away black iced coffee and an apple turnover. You praised the coffee so much that made me curious."

The florist laughs. "You see, I'm a very skilled businesswoman. Please, wait a moment."  


With an apple turnover, iced coffee and the city planner in his hand, he leaves the flower shop. Got to hand it to the woman, the coffee is really awesome. Maybe because he only had instant coffee for over a month, but he has to admit that the coffee is really good. Properly he follows the instruction given by the florist.

 

As he walks to the playground, his eyes automatically scan all faces in the hope that he may discover Jeonghan. But without success he reaches the playground.

 

It's like Jeonghan has described, huge brick walls surround the playground. The only way to look into the playground is the gate, which is open. In the playground are a swing, a seesaw, a sandpit, other toys and a crawl through tunnel. Oh and a big chestnut tree. Jeonghan never mentioned a chestnut tree. Well, childhood memories are usually a bit muddled up and blurry.

 

A little boy plays in the sandbox and an old woman watches the boy from a bench, most likely the boy's grandma. Although Seungcheol did not expect to find Jeonghan here, he hopes to find more clues about his whereabouts as the playground seems not to be far away from Jeonghan's family home according to the businessman story.

 

"Um, excuse me."

The old woman looks up and croaks, "Please come closer. I don‘t hear very well."

 

The photographer walks slowly through the gate to the old woman until something grabs him by the leg.

 

"Do not go any further, intruder. Who are you that you dare to invade King Lee's kingdom?"

His gaze wanders down to his legs, where the little boy from the sandbox glares at him and clasps his leg like a monkey.

 

"There! There! Great King Lee, I'm just asking for an audience with your grandmother."

"We're not taking any au-au-au whatever that is." Lee demands, while tightening his grip around his leg. He wonders how Lee can even see anything because of his long bangs.

 

Then Seungcheol just laughs and lifts the boy up. "But if King Lee refuses, I have no choice."

"Let me down." The boy screams, trying to get out of Seungcheols grip.  
"You get along well with my grandson," the old woman chuckles.

"Not at all," Both shout at the same time.

 

The old woman just giggles.

 

"Miss I have a question, does a family Yoon live here nearby?"

The woman thinks awhile and answers, "I only know one family with surname Yoon, the family lived nearby, but they moved six years ago. God knows where. Unfortunately, I do not know any first names and I could also be wrong if it really is the family you are looking for. I probably could not even assign faces to the family. People here come and go, I cannot count them with my fingers."

 

"I understand, "murmurs Seungcheol and sighs in disappointment.

 

Suddenly the brat pulls him by his black hair and roars, "Hey stupid. Giving up, only weaklings do that."

 

"You're right, but not with the stupid part. Even if I have to cross mountains, seas for my love, I'll find my honey."

" Yuck, disgusting." Lee contorts his face with disgust. "Oh, how romantic", Sighs Lee's granny and continues to speak. "If I can help you in any other way ..."

 

_I miss my school days. If you go through a large alley you can reach my school, which is separated from the city by huge walls. Inside the walls the yard is laid out like a park with trees, colorful flowers and a little pond. It was almost like going from one world of concrete blocks to another, leaving all the problems behind._

 

After a moment's deliberation, Seungcheol begins to speak.

 

"Oh, I remember, the person I'm looking for once told me about a school where you have to go through a huge tree avenue to get to the front gate."

"Oh, you're lucky. Give me the city planner." the old woman speaks and points at the city planner in his hand. Immediately he gives her the city planner.

 

"Look. Here should be the school you described." The old woman points with her finger at the map. "It looks like the school is a bit far away from here..."

"Do not worry with the train you get there quite well. You just take the red line. But I cannot tell you for sure. Just look at the map at the train station."

 

"Thank you granny. I hope this takes me a step further to my love."

"No problem, I hope you find your love."

"Do not worry, I'll do my best”

 

"Why don't you just wait for a shooting star to appear on night the sky and make a wish that your love comes to you?" The little boy asks.

Seungcheol chuckles, "If only I had the time to stare into the starry sky every day and wait for a shooting star to appear, but I've already made a wish at a magical stone."

"A magical stone, how cool, and what did you wish?" The little boy babbles wide-eyed.

 

"That remains a secret."

"Idiot! That‘s mean."

 

"I should get on my way." Seungcheol says and finally lets the boy down.

The little brat sticks his tongue out, runs behind his grandmother and yells, "Do not come back before you've saved your princess."

"A self-determined prince is more like it." Seungcheol giggles and turns around.

"My goodness the children of today. They are the reason I feel so old lately."

"Feel? You are ancient."

"I'll pretend I didn't hear that Lee!" Grandmother teased her grandson and pinched his cheeks. Seungcheol raises his hand goodbye and leaves the two behind.

 

It's nearly noon and he still was not lucky enough to find a useful hint about Jeonghan's whereabouts. But at school there is certainly a hint. But there must be some trace of Jeonghan at school. It cannot be as if Jeonghan had never existed.

 

Seungcheol sighs he just hopes not to be unsuccessful. Damn it. He has just begun the search, but already starts to have doubts.

 

"Pull yourself together, you idiot. You won't leave this city until you have turned every stone around and found Jeonghan. "He tries to convince himself and captures strange glances from passersby.

 

Seungcheol does not care what these people think about him, right now Jeonghan is the only thing he can think of.

 

Somehow he made it to the next train station named Helianthos. At the moment he is trying to figure out which line, in which direction he has to take. After ten minutes, he knows approximately how he gets to his destination and buys a day ticket.

 

Slowly he makes his way through the crowd and waits until the next train arrives. But when he looks at the opposite side, his eyes widen and he thinks he sees a person looking like Jeonghan from behind for a short moment, before disappearing behind a concrete pillar.

 

Well out of the corner of his eye, it could have been someone else's. However, Seungcheol says good-bye to his ability to think and instead of calling for Jeonghan, he runs as fast as he can, regardless that he is jostling people.

 

Arriving on the other side, the train just comes in and he gets completely out of breath in the last wagon. The black haired man just hopes that the person he believes is Jeonghan has also entered the same train. Not only his compartment is crammed to the brim, the whole train is and he has trouble squeezing through the people.

 

From each side people hiss complaints or insults at him. But he does not care, because his thoughts are full of Jeonghan. Seungcheol has made it to halfway as the train enters the next station. There are a lot of people getting off and he's taking the chance to go on ahead. As the train slowly drives out of the station, he looks back and sees the person he believes to be Jeonghan standing at the station.

 

Well at least his back and it could be someone else, but he is 100 percent sure that he is. He would recognize that perfect body proportion miles away. How much a fool in love he has become.

 

Suddenly the person turns around. It is really Jeonghan. As so many times, he looks into Jeonghan's eyes and for a brief moment it seems the other does the same, but Jeonghan's eyes do not see him. Then Jeonghan continues on his way and Seungcheols eyes are glued at the businessman as long as he can until Jeonghan vanishes in the crowd. The other looked so sad.

 

He clenches his hand into a fist. How he would like to smash the window. "Damn ..." But he must keep calm and opens his hand again, his knuckles already have turned yellow. Right now it is really hard for him keeping his composure. When you are so close to something and its slip away just before the finishing line... No wonder that fumes a lot of rage in him.

 

The photographer plops down to one of the empty seats and puts his face in his hands. Seungcheol takes a deep breath and tries to collect himself. It will be pointless to go back to find Jeonghan among the many people. Jeonghan will certainly not wait for him at the entrance, the younger could be anywhere by now. Maybe he has a better chance at school; there will certainly be a teacher or other people, who might remember Jeonghan. He finally decides to go to school instead of going back.

 

After five minutes, which felt like an agonizing eternity, the train finally reaches the next station and he gets out. Now he just has to drive in the other direction again like he originally planned. But when he arrives on the other side an announcement sounds. "Please take note of the fact that the route in the direction of Helianthos is currently closed due to construction work. For alternative possibilities or routes information the information board or our information centre are available for your service. We apologize for the inconvenience and thank you for your patience and understanding."

 

"Wow today is not really my day ... I'll do anything for you Jeonghan," Seungcheol whispers.

 

With a sigh, the photographer goes to the Information Center of the Sation. Too often, a sigh has come over his lips today. Is it because of the fear not to find Jeonghan? But he has other problems than devoting more time to this thought, for example a whole complaining crowd in front of the information centre. It's almost like a mob gone mad. He wouldn't want to be in the shoes of the information desk worker.

 

"Because of you and your stupid railway company, I'm late for work. You could have announced it beforehand or provide replacement means of transport."

An obviously angry office worker roars. "I have to take my child to the dentist. Do you have any idea how long someone has to wait to get an appointment?" A woman screams holding a child by the hand and in her arms a baby, who probably wants to win the screaming fight against his mother.

 

Everything is out of control and the screaming of the crowd causes him headache. Maybe he should try it at the information board. Soon as he stands in front of the screen there is a blue screen and a note is attached "Unfortunately, the Information Board is currently out of order. Please contact the Information Centre. "No wonder people are upset and angry."

 

Maybe he should just ask someone. He looks around and speaks to a random passers-by. "Excuse me, maybe you can help me. I'm looking for a school with big walls and- "But before Seungcheol can finish his questions, he is interrupted by the passer-by, who is constantly looking at his wristwatch.  "Is information desk worker written on my forehead?"

"Please sir ..."

 

"I'm sorry I'm in a hurry ... " Seungcheol pulls a puppy face.

 

"Okay I'll just say it once so listen. You get to the school, when you turn left as soon as you leave the station. Just go straight ahead for 15 minutes until you come to an Italian bistro and turn left there. From there, walk down the street and take the first driveway to the right. Then you have reached your destination school. I'm sorry, I have to keep going. Goodbye."After the man rattled down these directions without taking a breath, he was already gone, before Seungcheol could even thank him.

 

Somehow this description doesn’t seem right, it is far too short and in his opinion completely wrong, but he is willing to be proved wrong. Determined, he follows the directions of the man until he turns left at the Italian Bistro.

 

After a few more meters he stands in front of a high wall in an alley and far and wide no school in sight.

 

"A dead end ..." But he does not give up. After a few more tries, he finally finds the school. Meanwhile, the sun has already set. No wonder he was at five different schools today and they were all very far away from each other. At least his day ticket was worth it. However, there was always something missing at the other schools like no tree avenue, too low walls, a girls' school or other factors. But this time he has a good feeling as he slowly walks through the tree avenue to the gate with the big walls.

 

When he stands in front of the gate and looks up at the huge wall, it seems to him like huge obstacle that blocks his way to his happiness. But as long as there is a gate, there is an entrance, a way out of this unhappiness. Slowly his hands reach for the handlebar and push it down. But the gate is closed.

A deprecating laugh escapes his lips and he glances at his watch, which indicates three o'clock at night. No wonder the school is already closed. These high walls haunt him wherever he goes, at the playground, the dead end and then the school. For Jeonghan, these walls may exude a feeling of protection or isolation, but to him these walls are a symbol of unattainability.

 

Oh my, he should really postpone his search to tomorrow. He must be really tired if he already has such profound thoughts. There is also no point in continuing this late at night. With a heavy exhale, he finishes his search and tries his luck again tomorrow at school, as he now knows where the school is located. With this decision he turns around, but stops when he sees a snack vending machine. At the sight of snack vending machine his stomach starts to growl.

Since this morning Seungcheol only has eaten an apple turnover. He would not mind a chocolate bar.

 

"Wait….What was is again? "

 

_"Yes. I love –"_


	11. I am only human too (Jeonghans POV)

**Day 8 Monday**

_Sometimes the last step is the hardest, but the most fulfilling one._

 

"Not there." Jeonghan moans as the older man slowly leaves a trail of kisses, bites and bruises from his chest to his neck.

"Liar. You like it, " a husky voice growls so demanding in his ear, that fills his body with excitement and a desire for more and more. It will never be enough. His whole mind is fogged with ecstasy. He looks up and sees Seungcheol hovering over him. His eyes like a predator ready to devour his prey. And Jeonghan is ready to give in. He feels so weak. The Older hand glides slowly from his lower leg to his inner thigh, dangerous-

 

"Ring ring"  
  
The ringing of the alarm rips Jeonghan out of his sweet dream back to reality. When he slowly comes to himself and looks around, he realizes that he is back home and there is no Seungcheol hovering over him whispering all those bittersweet things in his ear. At the thought of his suggestive dream, his cheeks turn red. How he misses this idiot.

 

Why does it feel like their goodbye was just them walking in circles?

How could that loser just leave him like that?

 

He misses him so much, but now he will never see him again. There is nothing left to expect, to hold on. But before he starts crying again, he gets up, runs to his fridge, gets a family pack of ice cream and goes back to his bed pulling the blanket over his head and spooning away his sadness.

Well and maybe also to cool down a bit.

 

Since Jeonghan has come back home from his trip home, he only thinks of Seungcheol, even in his dreams the latter is haunting him. His heart aches from these sadness and the wounds, which the pain has caused him as he has moved away from the photographer step by step, still hurt so much and remind him each day of the stupid idiot.

 

No second passes and he still feels where Seungcheol has touched him. It almost seems like his touch still lingers on his skin. With his finger, he travels from his arm to his wrist, where the other touched him when the photographer showed him how to fish. The thought of this brings Jeonghans corners of his mouth almost to raise, but the reality pulls him back to the ground. He feels his eyes wet again, immediately he stuffs a big spoon of ice into his mouth. In the hope to shut up his heartache and stupid thoughts. Seungcheol…

 

His lovesickness is interrupted by the repeated ringing of his cell phone. Completely annoyed, sad and still with the spoon in his mouth he reaches for his cell phone and looks, who disturbs him at this time.

 

 **Group chat name:** Why are we even friends?

Jeonghan Jun Soonyoung Seokmin Jisoo Wonwoo Chan

 

 **Soonyoung:** Jeonghan do you know what time it is? 9:45

 **Soonyoung:** It's time to go to work. It's Monday 9:46

 **Soonyoung:** M 9:46

 **Soonyoung:** O 9:46

 **Soonyoung:** N 9:47

 **Soonyoung:** D 9:47

 **Soonyoung:** A 9:47

 **Soonyoung:** Y 9:47

 **Wonwoo:** Oh my gosh your so annoying 9:47

 **Seokmin:** He certainly will not answer….. 9:48

 **Jun:** Hey Mr. Wildlife. You realize that it is Monday? Move you’re a** to work. 9:49

 **Jisoo:** That you censored it does not make it less unfriendly ... 9:50

 **Jeonghan:** I am ill. * Cough * I can’t make it. Not sorry.  9:51

 **Soonyoung:** Sick with love (｡・//ε//・｡) ♡ 9:51

 **Jisoo:** Oh I did not know that you are familiar with online text-based rpg Jeonghannie... What love? 9:52

 **Seokmin:** You are such a nerd. Did he meet his destined tree in the woods? 9:53

 **Jisoo:** Well I am not the one who plays with Yu-Gi-Oh cards like you though. 9:54

 **Soonyoung:** No, he met a hot guy in the wild. ;) 9:54

 **Jisoo:** What? And why I am not informed about this? Hello, what happened again with best friends forever?? I am taking back the best friend card. 9:46

 **Jeonghan:** You are all heartless without feelings. Big Idiots; all of you and Cheolie. (ಥ﹏ಥ) 9:47

 **Wonwoo:** Cheolie who is that? 9:48

 **Soonyoung:** That's his the hot guy 9:50

 **Chan:** How does Soonyoung know he's hot? 9:51

 **Jun:** Do you want to question Jeonghan's taste in men? 9:52

 **Jisoo:** Did he ditched you? Or why don't you call him? 9:53

 **Jeonghan:** …. 9:53

 **Soonyoung:** They forgot to exchange their numbers. 9:54

 **Jisoo:** Oh ... Do you know what will help you? 9:55

 **Seokmin** : cake 9:56

 **Soonyoung:** A big big hug from me :3 9:56

 **Wonwoo:** to leave the group chat  9:57

 **Chan:** Jane Austen movies marathon 9:58

 **Jun:** work work work. So much work that you cannot think about anything else. Only numbers, applications, customers and so on. There's no room for your hot guy 9:58

 **Jisoo:** God you are all so mean. What Jeonghan needs now is a good friend to talk to. 9:59

 **Jeonghan:** You're right Jun. I'm going to work so hard that I do not have to think about Cheolie for a second ... .I'm going to eat my family pack of ice cream first. See you later nerds 10:02

 **Jisoo:** ...Idiot.. You are one too 10:03

 

Still deeply sad, he puts away his mobile phone. Jun is right he needs to distract himself by his constant thoughts of his love. And burying himself with work, may help him to keep him thinking less about Seungcheol. With this decision he spooned all the ice cream down. Does he feel even worse now? Definitely not. You cannot sink deeper when you are already at the abyss of your feelings. Completely listless he gets up.

 

Suddenly he curses himself for putting a mirror on the bedroom door. He would have gladly spared the sight of his broken hearted self, who is drowning into lovesickness. His eyes are red and swollen, because of his crying and blue dark circles adorn his flawless face from lack of sleep. His hair is a mess. By no means does he want to see his present self. It hurts his pride and only hurts him more that he could ever develop such desperate feelings for somebody. But he does not care. He is not ashamed of his feelings. It is rather that he is ashamed to have never confessed. That he was too cowardly.

 

To put into words how much someone else means to you is art. Unfortunately, art is not always appreciated.

 

With a deep sigh, he opens the door and heads for the bathroom. In order not to look like the antagonist in a horror movie, he decides to take a shower first. After half an hour, he looks halfway passable. Except for his swollen eyes, where not even make-up helps.

 

He sluggishly grabs his apartment key and feels something caressing his legs. When he looks down, he sees his white ball of wool.

 

"Oh my you already awake Serengeti?" Jeonghan murmurs and kneels down to pet his cat, which purrs with relish.

 

"MMmh even you pity me, when you lift your lazy butt up to say goodbye to me..." He presses a soft kiss on Serengetis fur and then leaves his apartment. It has to be almost noon.

 

Again he falls into the constant repeating everyday life. He runs down the familiar stairwell and opens the same entrance door as every day, as he has always done. The sky is covered with gray clouds, so bleak as if the sky is adjusting to his feelings. Jeonghan continues his way to the next train station Helianthos.

 

The train station is full of people like him with their briefcases and suits. They get up, go to work and drive back in the evening. Everyone can still be so different from each other, but everything comes down to death. We all have the same destination in the end, unless you are a vampire.

 

The train arrives and he gets in at the very front.  
  
Squeezed between people, the train finally departs.

 

The warmth of the people brings him back to the time with Seungcheol. How they always touched each other by accident, as if their bodies yearn each other like two magnets, they always find a way. But soon he will lose his sanity for sure, if the warmth of the sweating crowd makes him remember Seungcheol. Oh he really misses the idiot. Is that what people call post-love depression?

 

Fortunately, the ride does not last long and he reaches the next station, where he gets off.  
A few minutes longer, he would have gone completely crazy. He is the one to blame; he holds his feelings as a prisoner in his heart. So none of them can escape and hurt him. But now they are rioting in his heart and it hurts so much. He is afraid, when he lets his feelings escape, they may create greater harm. The more time passes, the more pain these feelings cause. Guess, they are sadists who enjoy playing with him and make him suffer. How much he wishes that feelings could leave like a train the station of his heart.

Jeonghan looks back at the leaving train with unhappiness in his eyes.

 

But the only thing he sees in the passing tinted glass of the train is his reflection of his self-pitying self. For a while he stares after the train. Seungcheol is like the train that slowly disappears from his sight. Bit by bit, until there is nothing left but an irrelevant memory of a love that never had the chance to bloom. The thought awakens the sadness in him again. Unable to endure the sight, he turns around and hurries to get to work as quickly as possible. To finally forget, at least he hopes that.

 

As soon as Jeonghan has taken a step through the door of his department, he is greeted by the sheer chaos. The department is more like a kindergarten. Soonyoung and Seokmin are in the middle of a paper ball fight and Jisoo tries to stop them without success. Jun argues with a customer and hisses some insults in Chinese. Wonwoo, on the other hand, ignores his ringing telephone and continues to stare at his computer instead. Well, at least he hopes that the other does his job and does not play computer games. And Chan tries to understand the shredding machine. He has probably put too much paper in the opening and now the shredder complains with an annoying nonstop beeping. No one comes up with the idea to help him. No wonder the other departments make a big bow around this department.

 

Why did he even come to work? He is not even two minutes here and he already has a headache as if he had been partied all night. Since nobody seems to notice or pay attention to him, he just goes to his office and slams the door shut. Jeonghan drops onto his office chair and ignores the huge pile of papers on his desk. It does not take ten seconds, the door to his office is opened and his entire colleague burst in.

 

"Jeonghan, our saviour. What would we do without you? You're back. I can hardly believe it. Break out the violins." Seokmin screams too loud.

 

"Soonyoung broke the printer when he wanted to scan his face or his lower part. Nobody is sure what the outcome looked like." Wonwoo monotonously throws in without any context.

"Why are you telling him this now? This has no connection. He certainly has other problems than a broken printer." Soonyoung mutters and glares at the traitor.

"You forgot to mention that it was a new printer." Jun corrects him with a smirk.

 

"And what about the lamp in the doorway that Soonyoung broke in the eraser fight with Seokmin?" Chan asks with a satisfied smile that he finally gets revenge on Soonyoung, because he misused him as an errand boy.

 

"It was about honour. Backstabbers. A man does not flee from a fight." Soonyoung defends himself.

 

Everyone is looking expectantly at Jeonghan. They are curious what kind of punishment or lecture Soonyoung would get. But after a long unpleasant eternity, their hopes for a bit of excitement in their boring workday were dashed.

 

"Mhm. I see," Jeonghan sighs, lays his head on the table and draws an imaginary circle on the table with his finger, "Life is just a disappointment."

 

Each of them stares at him with their mouth hanging open.

 

"Oh god, that's not Jeonghan. What if he got exchanged by the government? We are going to die."Seokmin gasps. Jisoo rolls his eyes.

 

„That’s it. I have enough.” With these words he chases the others out of Jeonghan's office.

 

"Soonyoung; you help Chan with the shredder and take care of him. And I warn you don't abuse him as your personal assistant. Wonwoo you finally answer the telephone and don’t play games on your computer. Jun be friendly to the customers and finally do your papers. Seokmin the pile of applications and papers will not get lesser by fooling around.  So start working. And I'll take care of Jeonghan," Jisoo orders, before the others can answer he slams the door shut in front of his co-worker, and sits down on a chair in Jeonghan's office.

 

"Thank you…."

"No problem. Tell me everything." Jisoo whispers and lays his head in his hands. Jeonghan stares out the window for a while before answering.

 

"On the trip I met this sweet loser of photographer. In the beginning, I was totally pissed off by him, but little by little that idiot stole my heart with his nature, when he shows his gummy smile, when he's friendly, when our hands touch, when he holds me and-"

"Oh my, I get it, I understand you love um "

 

"Seungcheol. His Name is Seungcheol. We said goodbye. I think neither of us could have denied that there was a certain tension between us, but we both chose the easy way out. I walked away step by step and he said no word, nothing. Then we forgot to exchange our mobile numbers because of the tense mo-o-d. Oh, Jisoo lo-v-e is so co-m-pli-cat-ed." Jeonghan whispers and tries to hold back his tears.

 

"Ah, Jeonghan calm down. I've never seen you so miserable before." Jisoo confesses with a worried look.

 

"Do not worry Jisoo; it just should not supposed to be. Everything will be fine after a few mon--t-h-s"

The last few words barely come over Jeonghan's lips before he bursts into tears.

 

"Don't fool yourself. You seem to really like him." Jisoo speaks softly and pats Jeonghan's head.

"I miss Cheolie so-o-o m-u-c-h. Even if he sometimes acts like a big loser, he still is my idiot.  Alm-o-st m-i-n-e." The businessman sobs barely understandable.

 

Without saying anything, Jisoo gets up and turns on the computer.

 

"I do not feel able to work. I'm just so confused, tired and worn out," Jeonghan sniffs and looks at his friend with puffy eyes.

 

"What's his full name?"

"Choi Seungcheol," the sad man whimpers, emphasizing every letter of the name from the person he loves like he could cast a spell to summon Seungcheol.

 

"And what do you know about him?"

"Cheolie is a renowned landscape photographer and journalist. He lives in Poisson. He also gives his plants names. "Jeonghan answers softly.

 

At the last answer, Jisoo raises his eyebrow and suppresses a giggle. After that, Jisoo types Choi Seungcheol landscape photographer and journalist Poisson into the search engine.

 

Suddenly many articles, pictures and other websites about Seungcheol appear.

"Is this your honey?" Jeonghan just nods.

"I have to admit he really looks like a snack and is really famous in certain circles. Your Cheolie was even Mr. Poisson in 2012. Wow, the clothes and the poses are ... um ... look that's the address to his studio and the phone number of his studio and- "

 

"Enough with the lovesickness. I'll go to Poisson and tell that idiot that I love him," Jeonghan speaks resolutely and gets up from his chair.

 

Jisoo stares at him dumbfounded for a moment before he collects himself.

„How ambitious you are. Um, call him first? That seems to me to be the better solution than simply going to Poisson without knowing anything." Jisoo tries to change his mind.

 

“Calling certainly not, you do not do that.I want to tell him personally. Jisoo, I'll take this week off as well." Jeonghan demands and heads for the door before Jisoo grabs his sleeve.

 

"Ok Jeonghan. Slow down. It's late afternoon and to leave now without any preparation is really stupid. Go home pack your stuff and think about what you really want to say to him. Before you embarrass yourself and stutter strange stuff in front of him. I've also was in Poisson recently for a short while. I met this really hot guy. He's from Poisson too and he's tall, suntanned, like a cute puppy and-"

 

"Jisoo I'm not interested in your happy love life right now. I just want to see Cheol again ... But you're right I'm going home now and think what I'm going to say in front of this idiot, so my newfound courage will not leave me, while confessing my feelings." With these words he leaves his office leaving and a protesting Jisoo behind.

 

On his way to the elevator he ignores the questions of the other and just walks by.

 

Once in the elevator, he pushes the button to the ground floor. Soon as the elevator starts to move, the terrible elevator music starts playing. Jeonghan does not know what has come over him. Since he met Seungcheol, he makes one wrong decision after the other.

But this time only he wants to do everything right.

 

He wants Seungcheol to know what he feels for him. If the feelings are not founded on mutuality, he still has certainty; ring down the curtain on those uncherished feelings; an end. Then this lingering pain in his heart would eventually go away, but right know his love is a gaping wound in his heart that does not heal.

 

"Excuse me? Do not you want to get out? "Jeonghan looks at the voice. In front of him stands a delivery man with a package in his hand. He is so rattled that he didn’t realize that the elevator has arrived on the ground floor.

"Um. Yeah, thanks... " How embarrassing; the man for sure must think he is out of his mind. At least he realizes that he has to pull at the glass door and not press, since it is written in big bold letters on the door.

 

Jeonghan reaches his apartment after half an hour. No wonder the railway track towards Helianthos are currently under construction work, so there were some failures and delays in this direction. He had to drive with the bus through the overcrowded streets.

 

But now he is finally home. Home… Where nobody waits for him except for his cat, who does not even welcome him, instead Serengeti enjoys dozing on his couch.

 

"How nice it is to have no worries Serengeti." Jeonghan whispers and takes a seat next to his sleeping cat. "What should I tell him when I face him? Am I able to say anything? Or will the words never come out my mouth? What kind of answer do I expect to hear? Is my courage already leaving me? I don’t know…"Jeonghan mumbles into the silent room.

 

"What am I supposed to do? I feel so cold."

 

**Day 9 Tuesday**

 

Jeonghan leaves his apartment early in the morning at seven o'clock. Actually, his train arrives at 9:30, but he couldn't bear to stay any second longer in his empty apartment. The businessman didn't get a wink of sleep this night. The thoughts of Seungcheol kept him awake all night long. The memory of the other, what he should say when they face each other, whether this path is the right one.... All these thoughts do not leave him alone.

 

With an uneasy feeling Jeonghan walks down the still empty streets, because in this direction they move away from the hustle and bustle from the main road and the centre.

 

Not far from here is a small park with a pond where he would like to take a little walk to calm down and get some rest. He feels more and more exhausted from his emotions than after the many kilometres he walked a day on his trip.

 

Jeonghan cannot remember exactly when it was the last time he walked down this street. It awakens a certain nostalgia in him. Why did he stop walking this way? As an excuse, he would say that he has not found time. But the truth is, he was never tempted to go to the park. He preferred his hectic everyday life.

 

The full cafes, the nightlife, the city lights, his friends, unknown faces, traffic jams, work, ... all these things distanced him from the calm he seeks. Not calmness like a lonely silence, a peaceful calmness full of security and happiness.  It's hard to explain, not that these things do not bring him happiness, but slowly these things became part of a repeating daily life. Every day began to feel so trivial and lethargic. As if something was missing. But finally he wants to change something or at least he imagines it.

 

His gaze falls on a driveway in a small alley

. "Was there not the candy store? I wonder if the shop still exists ..." the brown-haired whispers softly to himself.

 

Burned with curiosity, he goes down the alley until he sees the sign with the lettering “Memento”. Jeonghan never expected the candy store to exist. In addition, the store has hardly changed, the facade is still painted red, the cats logo is still the same. Only the once white awning was replaced with a new red awning with white stars pattern. The sign on the old wooden door shows “open”.

 

Maybe it calms him a little when goes back to the roots of his childhood.

 

Slowly he pushes the door handle down and the ringing of the doorbell interrupts the silence. As soon as he opens the old door, he sees a paradise for children and sweet tooths. Candy canes and bonbons in all colours, giant lollies, chocolates, cookies, sugar snakes, gummy bears, marshmallows, biscuits, chewing gum, caramel, salty liquorice, cotton candy, sherbet powder, jelly beans, marzipan and much more.

 

A place that makes all dentists rich. A bored man in his mid-forties sits at the counter and pays not much attention to him than a quick glance upwards before he continues reading in his book.

 

Jeonghan grabs a paper bag and starts to fill in some sweets. His eyes are always on the door. His imaginations start to run wild. Why know? His fantasy brings scenarios to life of how Seungcheol could storm through this door every second and just hold him tight. How absurd this thought is. The businessman tries to get rid of this thought by continuing to concentrate to fill the paper bag with his favourite sweets.

 

All of a sudden the ringing of the door sounds which makes his heart beat faster. His heart is pounding so loud and there is this weird feeling rising in him. What if it is Seungcheol? Why is he so desperate clinging to any absurd possibility? But he cannot resist not looking back. So he looks carefully behind his shoulders. At the entrance are two schoolchildren who count their money how many sweets they can afford. Immediately his absurd hope was gone. How bittersweet an unattainable love is.

 

Almost unattainable, he will go to Poisson, put an end to this absurdity of yearnings and dreams and let them revive, so that they become the reality. Maybe it makes him a selfish person, but if he wants something, he gets it. He is a spoiled brat, who likes to be pampered. For sure the various fragrances of that shop must have dazed his senses, in order that he cannot think clearly and suddenly started to panic. Jeonghan quickly pays the candy and leaves the candy store. Then he continues his way to the park while stuffing a strawberry gummy in his mouth.

 

After five minutes he is back on the road towards the park. The street is surrounded on the right and left by lanterns, where in between a few trees have crept in. There wasn't a soul in sight. Solely the wind is his only companion, blowing through his brown hair. The trees are huge chestnut trees that form a roof of green leaves. The rising morning sun brings the big chestnut leaves to glow. It's like looking at the sun with your eyes closed, and instead of seeing black, you see red. Just like that, the leaves glow in a beautiful green. How pretty, he never payed attention to that.

 

Suddenly he is torn out of his thoughts as someone grabs him by the wrist.

 

"Jeonghanie." A voice gasps.

  


The voice that haunts him every, every fucking night.

 

Just by the mere touch he knew who stopped him.

 

He turns around, the words barley left his mouth and he stutters. "Seungcheolie. You-"

 

In front of Jeonghan stands the man who gave him sleepless nights and claimed all his thoughts for himself. Guess, we are both selfish.

 

Silence.

 

Neither of them says a word or finds the right words to speak to break the silence. The two just stare at each other as if they cannot believe that this moment is real, that the two really face each other and look deep into each other's eyes.

 

Is this a dream? Then please never wake me up again.

 

Until Seungcheol finally put his trembling hands in his.

So warm.

 

„Am I dreaming?“  Jeonghan whispers.

 

“I'm wondering too, maybe we're dreaming the same dream.”

 

“Beautiful. If that is the case let us sleep forever.”

 

"A never-ending dream. Um. You're probably wondering what I'm doing here. Actually I was looking for you, you're really not easy to find. But that's not what I want to say. During our time together I was very happy and my whole body was filled with that tickling feeling of warmth. It's hard to find the right words. "Seungcheol chuckles nervously and squeezed his hands lightly.

 

"What I want to say ... um ... I want you to understand how I feel and how I see you through my eyes. Your complaints, your cute face when you try to be angry, your flushed face when someone praises you, your kindness, when you laugh, your fascination with flowers, how you learn step by step to befriend the nature, the way you make me happy and laugh. Everything of you makes me feels so warm and complete. But then you were gone and only cold was left behind." Seungcheol paused for a moment and looked up to Jeonghan before continuing.

 

"I was so blind. I closed my eyes to my feelings for you because I was afraid you would make fun of them and I did not want to lose you. I just want you to be happy. Forgive me for being selfish and standing in front of you, because to life with this uncertainty only hurts more. Maybe there is a chance. Yoon Jeonghan I love you. I am sor- "

 

Even before Seungcheol could say a word, Jeonghan falls into his arms and hugs him tightly.

 

"Do not you dare to apologize for your feelings. I love you too Cheolie. For real, so much it makes me look like a fool."

 

Seungcheol strengthens his grip around him. "You know humans are stupid and I am only human too. I was an idiot."

 

Jeonghan raises his head so he can look into Seungcheols eyes and all he sees is love and affection oozing from them.

 

"Yes, a big idiot," he whispers and leans in, so that their lips touch.

 

All the pent-up feelings are flowing through his body like a storm of butterflies. He feels like his world is falling out of orbit and colliding with Seungcheols. Their losing their control. Lips pressed at each other, heavy breathing and it's slowly getting hotter. The kiss deepens. Seungcheol glides one hand in Jeonghans soft hair and pulls him closer. Just a kiss can’t satisfy their for too long starving love for each other. Until the need for oxygen Seungcheol parts the kiss and presses his forehead on Jeonghans.

 

"Even if I say a thousand times it will never be enough, but I love you. Words can't even express how much I love you."

 

"It is enough for me. You are here holding me tight. My head is still screaming that I should wake up from this dream. But then I feel your racing heart."Jeonghan gently moves his right hand over Seungcheols chest to his heart. "But my heart does same. It makes me imagine reality isn't so bad." With his left hand, Jeonghan guides Seungcheols hand to his chest to his pounding heart.

 

The older man covers his cheeks with his hands and presses a kiss on Jeonghan's forehead.

 

"I am happy that my way led to you. You make me as happy as I never could have imagined in my wildest dreams. It is said that when you reach your destination it is the most beautiful. "

"I'm your destination? "Jeonghan breathes and snuggles into the older ones shoulder.

 

„Yes. Sometimes the first steps are the hardest. At the start, you seem to be so far away. Only with small steps we got closer to each other. Looking back, we didn‘t see the beginning and, looking ahead there is no end in sight. There was a time we got lost on our way to each other. We have overcome a lot of obstacles on our journey. Slowly the end came closer, whether I give up or reach you Jeonghan. For sure the last step is the hardest, but the most fulfilling one. It was hard for me to tell you all this, but there ain't no mountain view that is more beautiful than looking into your eyes.. “

 

"Gosh, since when have we become so cheesy?" Jeonghan giggles slightly before continue.

 

"How did you find me? I mean, you hardly know anything about me..."

 

"You are wrong; you actually talked a lot about yourself. The flower shop "Marys Wish ", the playground, the school, but somehow all traces came to nothing. Even the school has denied me the information, something because of privacy, the woman said in the Secretariat...But then I remembered…"

 

_"Yes. I love sweets. As a kid, I ate sweets every day. Most of the time I went to a little old candy store after school. I think the name was Memento and the logo was a black cat. I wonder if the shop still exists, since you can buy sweets in every convenience store.“_

 

Seungcheol pauses for a moment before continuing to speak. All Jeonghan can do is listening to every single word. He would like to burn the warm words Seungcheol says, word for word, forever into his memories.

 

"I meant the chance was not high that you are there or anyone knows something about you ... but there was not much I can hold on to. And then I saw you from afar ... and ran. To be honest I ran a lot in the last two days." Seungcheol strokes Jeonghan's hair with one hand and with the other he holds him firmly to his chest.

 

"But it was worth it…"

 

"I see. Maybe I will admit that I also wanted to find you and was just on the way."  Jeonghan chuckles.

"You could have just searched the internet. I found you too. Mr. Poisson 2012. "

 

"Oh my, you have seen my embarrassing pictures. Yes, I could have done that, but I am an old man in terms of technology. The only things I can manage on my computer are my photo editing programs and my computer games."

 

Jeonghan looks up at Seungcheol again and sees his gummy smile. “You poor old man.” Jeonghan teases him and joins Seungcheol laughing. How he missed the stupid smile of the other. Maybe he was wrong, because not when Seungcheol laughs it is the most beautiful thing but when they laugh together and are happy.

 

The laughter fades away slowly and for a while there is silence. They just stand there hugging each other.

 

"Do you know what I wished back then?" Jeonghan mumbles and looks deep into Seungcheol eyes like they did so many times before.

 

"You mean by the devil's rock? What did you wish?"

 

The wind blows gently through their hair, brushing the leaves and making them rustle. A few minutes pass.

 

"That we are happy together." Not even for one second they break their eye contact.

 

"Then I should tell you what I wished?" Seungcheol leans closer to Jeonghan, so he feels the other's breath on his skin.

 

"Yes."

 

"I wished the same." Seungcheol breathes and kisses Jeonghan's lips again.  


This warm feelings like you're about to burst, is that what people call happiness?

 

If that's the case, then he's happy.

 

„Let’s go home my idiot.“

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This will be the end for the time being.  
> Maybe a few chapters will follow later. I hope you enjoyed reading the story.♥


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